Page 81 of Where the Heart Is

Her nose crinkled in disgust. ‘Because I’m getting the feeling you used me, Sawyer. You took advantage when I was vulnerable, and I’ll never forgive you for it.’

Ice trickled through his veins as he looked at the woman he’d give his life for, who was staring at him like he was lower than the cow patties scattering the nearby paddock.

He’d thought she’d be mad when he told her the truth, but he never expected it to be this bad. For her to assume the worst of him, to doubt his motives in entering a relationship with her, however fleeting, slugged him hard.

His entire life in this town he’d felt useless. People looked down on him. They pitied him for being a joker. They thought he’d never amount to anything.

Yet the way Mila had just judged and found him lacking … he’d never felt so worthless.

‘Do you have anything to say?’ she spat, every word laced with loathing, and he did what he always did when confronted by anyone who looked down on him.

He retreated.

‘Leave my bag outside, please. I’ll pick it up in the morning.’

Stifling every instinct urging him to take her in his arms and beg for forgiveness, he turned and walked away.

CHAPTER

49

As dawn filtered through the plantation shutters in Jack’s bedroom, Adelaide stretched, aching all over. She’d barely left the dance floor last night, with Jack matching her every move, something he’d done the night they met. Back then, she’d admired him for wanting to dance so much when most of the guys at the B & S ball stood on the outskirts, downing beers and ogling the girls. And last night, with every jive, foxtrot, and waltz, he’d reminded her of why she’d fallen in love with him; when Jack held her like he never wanted to let her go, she knew he was the man for her.

Not that she needed a ball to remind her of that. His every action lately had shown her how much she meant to him and these last couple of days felt like she’d never left at all.

‘You’re still an early riser like me.’ Jack rolled onto his side to face her, reaching out to drape his arm across her waist. ‘Best part of the day.’

That’s what she used to think, until they started coexisting in frosty silences and he couldn’t wait to down his coffee and head out onto the farm.

But that was the past and they were both older and wiser.

‘It is, though I doubt I’ll be able to get out of bed, I’m that sore.’

‘Oh, really?’ The mouth she’d kissed repeatedly last night curved into a wicked smile. ‘I thought you liked it a little rough.’

‘I’m talking about all the dancing we did,’ she said, gently slapping her palm against his chest. ‘That was some night.’

‘Reliving old times,’ he said. ‘The good parts.’

‘Does that mean you’re ready to put the bad parts behind us?’

It seemed odd, slipping it into a casual conversation, but would there ever be a good time to ask the hard questions? After last night, she knew where she wanted to be: by Jack’s side.

‘If you’re asking if I like having you around, Ads, of course I do.’ He cleared his throat and his hand on her waist trembled a tad. ‘I never stopped loving you.’

‘Oh, Jack …’ Tears sprang to her eyes and she blinked, her heart breaking as she glimpsed the tears in his. ‘I can’t make any promises, but I want to stay longer. Give us a chance at reconciling, with a view to moving back if you’ll have me?’

‘I think that’s a great idea,’ he said, without hesitation. ‘Stay for as long as you like.’ He eyeballed her. ‘Maybe forever?’

She wanted to say yes. She’d love nothing better than to resurrect her marriage. But despite the amazing time they’d had becoming reacquainted, she couldn’t quash all her reservations.

What if she moved back to Ashe Ridge and they ended up back where they once were, coexisting in frosty silences and bereft of intimacy? While they didn’t have the farm hanging over them, Jack’s manic work ethic hadn’t been the only problem in their marriage. And at their age, didn’t they only get grumpier from here?

‘By your resounding silence, I’m assuming that’s a no.’ His expression closed off and his hand slid off her waist. ‘So what is this? A fling before you hit the road again?’

‘You know it’s more than that.’ She sighed and snuggled closer to him. ‘I’m scared, Jack. Scared of falling back into the old routines where our marriage suffered. Scared of taking a chance on us again and getting hurt. Scared that if I move back permanently, the gloss will wear off our reunion and we’ll end up back where we started.’

His expression softened. ‘I appreciate your honesty, Ads, but I’m scared too. Terrified, in fact. You broke my heart last time and I can’t help but think no matter how long you stay this time, you’ll get bored again and leave.’

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