Page 45 of The Revenge

And then his body jerks, and hot liquid hits the back of my throat.

I take every drop before he finally releases me.

“Fuck, Tori. You didn’t need to do that.” He turns, sitting down in front of his desk beside me.

Tired but sated, I lean back, resting my head against his shoulder as he wraps his arm around me. For a few minutes, nothing exists out of his arms.

I want to stay here and enjoy the feeling. Only, as the last lingering sensations of my orgasms fade away, the cool air in the room brings me back to reality.

Payne seems to sense it too as we both redress ourselves in silence.

“Leave with me,” Payne says, suddenly. “I’m here because of Lucy, and it’s clear I’ll never find out what happened to her. But if you were leaving anyway, I figure we could leave together.”

My lips part as I try to process what he’s saying. “What?”

Payne reaches for my hand, taking it in his. “Come with me. We can start over. Together. Somewhere far away from here, and far from Synclair Keyingham.”

I might not have realized it until last night, but I’m starting to fall for Payne. The problem isn’t that he’s my professor. It’s that I was leaving, and I’ve not thought much about a future, much less one involving him. Not like this, anyway.

The dean made it clear that I’m to leave JKU today, but I still have every intention of attending the fundraiser with Syn to meet Preston. If I leave with Payne, I don’t think he’d want me to do that…

But even if he does, am I prepared to leave with him and then what? Jump into a relationship with him?

“Maybe it’s too fast, but yes, I mean leave and let us be together properly,” he tells me as though he’s reading my mind. “Leave James Keyingham University and not look back. This place isn’t good for either of us.”

Sucking in a deep breath, I gently pull my hand free from his. “I can’t. I was going to tell you last night that we might have a lead—”

“We?” Payne scowls. “You mean Synclair.”

I nod.

“You realize he’s probably behind this? Us being caught?”

I nod again. “I know, and I’m sorry.”

The warmth seems to fade from Payne’s eyes, and it’s like I’m looking back at the Payne I first met—the one who seemed to dislike me as much as Syn. “You’ve been playing his game from the moment you arrived here, and you still are. It’s obvious this is just another thing made up by him. You know that by choosing him you’re just going to end up in a world of pain—he’s not going to stop until he’s destroyed you.”

“I’m not choosing him. I’m choosing Cole,” I tell him, simply. “And if this could get more answers about Lucy, you’d want me to do this, too.”

Payne stares at me before he slowly shakes his head. “That’s where you’re wrong, Tori. I’d choose you. Iamchoosing you. I love you.”

His words should make me feel warm and fuzzy, but somehow, I just feel numb. “I can’t walk away without knowing I’ve tried everything.”

I know Penny struggles to understand this too. I thought given his desperate need to know what happened to his best friend’s sister—someone he considered practically his own sibling—meant Payne understood this too…

But even if he doesn’t, I know me.

Leaving now would be easier. And safer. Even if it’s not with him. But I know I’ll always be wondering what if. Worse, I’d never be able to look my brother in the eyes again.

With no warning, Payne steps forward, closing the gap between us as his hands gently grab my face. And then he’s kissing me desperately, like he’s using his tongue in another way to try to convince me.

I cling onto him, kissing him back. Part of me wishes that he would succeed, but it’s me who breaks the kiss.

“I’m sorry, Payne,” I whisper before I can change my mind.

He sucks in a deep breath as he lowers his head, pressing his forehead against mine. “I don’t know what else I can do or say right now, Tori. I truly wish you the best, and that you get the answers you need.”

Leaving him to finish packing up his office alone, I walk back to Denali House. Despite everything that’s happened, no one has given me the code to unlock the front door, so I make my way through the snow to the back of the house. This is the first time I’ve used this door since Declan attacked me. Even though the snow is showing signs of starting to melt, back here, even my previous footprints have disappeared.

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