This was the nicest one I had seen, clean and stocked with plenty of firewood. Ben showed me the bathroom first of course. And, yep, it was anactualtoilet. My life had become so pathetic that I was thrilled by a freaking toilet.
After the tour, we claimed the bigger room off to one side that had its own fireplace. Strangely, no door or sleeping platforms, but that was okay. Being inside, away from the now howling wind, was an immense relief.
As we ate some chicken fried rice sitting on the floor in front of the fireplace, I listened to Ben chat away about another time he had stayed here, but my eyes kept going to Tyler who was even quieter than usual. I wondered what he was thinking about so much. Whatever was going down tomorrow had to be on his mind.
Which was worse, though? Knowing or not knowing like me?
When Ben disappeared to the kitchen area to clean up, I reached for Tyler's hand, drawing his attention away from the fire. "Are you doing all right?" I asked.
His beautiful lips curved into a small smile. "I'm fine. Thanks for asking. How about you?"
"I'm not going to lie. I'm kind of anxious about everything," I admitted, "you know, especially not really knowing what's going on. But—"
"Look, I—"
"No, no." I squeezed his hand to stop him. "You don't have to say anything. It's okay. It really is."
He exhaled a deep breath, his eyes searching mine. "Thank you for that."
"I just want you to know..." I paused, unsure how to say it without revealing the extent of my feelings. "Idotrust you."
His smile grew, and my heart took off galloping.
"And, um," I continued, "there's something else I need to tell you."
"Aye? What is it?"
I didn't think my heart could beat any faster, but after everything we'd been through in the last day, Ihadto say something. Taking a slow breath, I let it out. "I've been... I've been having dreams about you."
His face was expressionless. "You mean about the situation we're in?"
"Mm, kind of. I guess." Maybe it was a mistake to tell him this, and that was my way out—just to pretend I was dreaming about our current nightmare. I shook my head. No. I neededto tell him. "It's more than that, though. I'vealwayshad dreams about you."
He stared at me, a blank look covering his features, but didn't say anything.
Seconds passed. A full minute passed. And nothing. Not a word or sound from him.
Damn it!
He really thought I was crazy now. Why had I told him? Why,again, did I have to open my big mouth?
"Knock, knock," Ben said near the door.
"Yeah? What's up?" Tyler asked.
"Just making sure everyone's decent. Whenever I disappear, I come back to see Kat pouncing on you, mate."
I threw a sock at him that he easily ducked.
"I can't blame her, though," Ben continued, sporting a big grin. "Handsomest bloke I've ever seen."
The other sock sailed through the air.
"Aren't you going to miss me, Kit Kat?"
"No!"
God, was I pissed. Not at Ben, not even at Tyler, but at myself. When would I ever learn? For the second time now, I had told him something—something monumental, something epic—and he had said nothing. Nothing!