Page 59 of Return to Me Always

Yeah, Ben had kind of interrupted both times. But both times, Tylerhada chance to say something, respond somehow. And he hadn't. Either time.

I feltsostupid, like a total, complete idiot, and I wasn't used to feeling this way. Something about Tyler made me do and say the dumbest things. I just wanted to crawl in a hole and never come out. Instead, I wiggled into my sleeping bag that was against the wall and turned my back to the room.

"Did I miss something?" Ben asked. "Lovers' quarrel?"

Not bothering to respond, I put in my earplugs, fuming silently to myself. Maybe I was acting like a child, but I didn't care right now. I was so tired of this whole damn thing, so tired of hiking, so tired of the nightmares, and most of all, tired of feeling this way about someone who so obviously didn't care at all about me.

There were whispering noises on the other side of the room—something about a boat—as the wind whipped through the fireplace threatening to put out the flames. I hoped that Tyler would settle down for the night beside me as he'd done so often before. But if he did, I never felt it.

***

The wind woke me up in the morning, howling around the corners of the isolated building. Tyler slept a few feet away with Ben on the other side of the room. Never having been awake before Tyler, I studied him as he slept on his back, his face tilted slightly toward me.

God, he was beautiful—long lashes that rested against his cheeks, sensual, full lips, sexy stubble that accentuated his jawline. With a shiver, I remembered how that stubble had felt against my face, his roughness against my softness.

His eyes opened suddenly, catching mine in an instant. "Hey," he said quietly.

I smiled, embarrassed at being caught staring. "Hey."

"You actually woke up before me?" he asked, a brow raised.

"Yeah. I could go back to sleep if you want." I yawned, covering my mouth.

"Nice try, lass. We have a big day ahead of us." The wind rushed through the fireplace. "And it sounds like we might have some mingin' weather."

I let out a groan because I wasn't one-hundred percent sure about that word, but I knew it couldn't be good. "Any chance we get to sleep in a hotel room tonight? With a hot shower and a real bed?"

He hesitated for a moment before answering. "If I'm being honest, I'm not sure what's going to happen."

What did that mean?

Before I could think too much about it, Ben woke up, and we began our morning routine, inhaling a quick breakfast as we all packed up. Glancing out the window, we could see the wind and rain battling each other. I sighed at the prospect of hiking in that, again, but at least it was the last day before we ended up wherever we were going.

As we headed out, we all seemed lost in our thoughts, although the weather and wind, which hurled up anything we had to say to the angry sky, certainly didn't help conversation.

I so desperately wanted to know what the plan entailed. My scattered mind, when I wasn't focused on staying upright in the punishing wind, shifted between my embarrassment about the night before and my fear of the unknown.

But Tyler hadn't acted like he thought I was crazy this morning—even though I had been staring at him when he opened his eyes. Maybe he hadn't understood completely what I had told him. Of course, he hadn't. Who would? If I ever spoke about it again with him—and that was ahugeif—I'd have to be more clear. But God, I didn't think I could.

Feeling so vulnerable was new to me. After the "Tyler, I'm falling for you" incident and then the dream confession, my self-esteem had taken a humongous hit. I didn't feel very sure of myself at all.

Always before with that strange thing called the male species, they had taken the first step with me. They had been the initiators of everything, and it felt terrible to actually admit my feelings to Tyler and have him not respond back in kind. Not only that, he had completely ignored it.

Caught up in my misery and not paying attention, I plunged knee deep into a boggy mess, soaking my legs. Ugh, could this day get any worse?

Yeah, it definitely could, I found out. Way worse. Like terrifying nightmare-level worse.

Chapter Seventeen

For most of the day, we traveled alongside a humongous loch being hammered by the rain and wind. Eventually, I could hear the sound of crashing waves and smell salt in the air, and I realized we were close to the sea.

Was a sea town our destination? Or were we going to the islands? The only island I really could name was Skye, but I knew there were more.

Houses began to pop up on the horizon, and the sea rose up on our left, the intensity of the rising surf intimidating with its ferocity. The wind lashed hair into my eyes, stinging my face like a wet whip.

Hours after night fell, we entered a small town, the strong smell of fish permeating through the rain. No person could be seen, and the houses and businesses were dark, bustled up against the heavy downpour. I imagined people snug in their beds under layers of warm, dry blankets, and a pang of envy shot through me. Would I ever be safe like that again?

After passing through the main street, full of shuttered seafood restaurants and touristy shops interspersed with small-town businesses, we spotted a bar, a warm glow spilling from its windows onto the street.

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