Page 58 of Working Out West

“Dimitri, you know I care for you like a brother. Better than my brothers. But I would prefer not to speak of this for now.” I could not allow myself to think of a future for West and me as yet. I needed him healed. Needed him to understand I would not run, no matter what he thought of himself. Most of all, everything that had happened to him was still too fresh for me, and anger brimmed close under my skin to a point I would rip another’s throat out if they said one wrong word about him.

“I understand,” Dimitri said as he pulled into the underground parking area.

“Thank you,” I told him when he parked. I exited and walked toward the elevators; the guards visibly stilled when they saw the blood on me. Ignoring them, I swiped the card and waited for the doors to open as Dimitri stopped at my side.

“Will we be here long?”

“Nyet. I want a shower and to pack more items.”

“I shall take the time to shower also. I will meet you on your floor,” he explained as we entered the elevator.

“Let my parents know I am here for a moment.”

“I will. They will want to see you.”

I nodded. “Give me ten minutes.”

“Done.”

Dimitri got out on his floor, and I went all the way up to mine for a much-needed shower. After, I stood out on my balcony in the midmorning sun, sipping a bourbon straight.

“Vodka is always better, son. Do not let your mother catch you drinking that,” Papa said in Russian as he walked out to stand beside me.

“Where isMama?”

“In our rooms. I wanted a chance to speak with you.”

I rested my hip against the balcony and faced him. “What about?”

He gazed out over the scenery in thought. I took the time to finish my drink and set the glass on the ground before straightening and waiting some more.

“Was I a bad father?”

The shock from the question had my head jerking back. “What? Nyet.”

He hummed under his breath.

“I know our lives weren’t… normal, but had I acted too cold, where you thought you couldn’t come to me about things?”

“You were strict but never cold. What has brought this on?”

He looked at me. “Why had you never come to me, to your mother and I, and told us you preferred men? Did you feel you had to run to another place in the world to live how you wanted? Why did you feel you had to hide?”

Fuck.

“It was never anything you or Mama did. It was what surrounded us. I felt it easier to keep it to myself, and in a way, I did not want to burden either of you. I did not feel I could be myself in Russia. I have even found it hard here also. Until I met West.”

“I would have killed anyone who would have said anything back home.”

I sighed and scrubbed a hand over my face. “Even your other sons? Both have made comments about gay men. They have shown their distaste, and I never wanted you or Mama to be put in a position to take sides.I would also like to keep this from them as long as I can.”

“They are idiots sometimes, but they would have supported you in the end.Still, I will not say anything. I never would.”

“Thank you.” I glanced over his shoulder. “Our lives were always different, and I knew coming out would have tarnished the family business.” I met his gaze. “You know this.”

He spat to the side and snarled, “They are all imbeciles to think I would not have fought them all to make sure you had a happy and safe life.”

“I would never want war between you and your people. It was better if I took myself out of the equation. It was hard to leave, but it was the better choice.”

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