Page 65 of Ruin

“There could be other rivals Jiro sought out. Not that he admitted to anything more before he died, but I’m not willing to take a chance and have my family vulnerable.”

I scrubbed a hand through my hair and shook my head. “If you’re worried about Mimi, Cowboy can take her back.”

“No. I don’t trust many, but I do you. I want you with her.”

A frustrated growl dropped from my lips. “Taro, you’re not thinking clearly—”

“I think the separation would do us good as well.”

“What the fuck are you talkin’ about?”

“You need to make sure this is what you want. You’ve only ever been with women, Josh. This, what’s happened here, could only be a…” He shrugged. “…a lonely moment in time.”

“Don’t say that bullshit, arsehole. You know it’s not only that.”

He looked away from my angry gaze. “I worry about my business rubbing off onto the Hawks MC, your family, and causing them problems. The club is clean.Youare clean. I’m not. You know what I deal in. U-Until I can clear some things up,” his voice wavered, “I need anyone associated to the Hawks MC away from here.”

“Clear what things up?”

“Family matters.”

I was about to open my mouth and say more when he ate up the space between us and wrapped his arms around me. His forehead hit my shoulder. “Please, for me, take this time to make sure you want this. Protect Mimi for me. Mother, my aunt, and Jiro’s daughters are going back to Japan for a while. I’ve spoken to her. It’s just for a little while. I… I have so much going on, and I can’t handle… I won’t be able to handle it if anything happened to anyone I care about. Please,pleasedo this for me.”

Fuck.

Christ.

“I can help,” I tried.

“I know you can, but it’s not something I can accept right now.” When we didn’t know if I was certain I’d still want him. That was what he’d left out.

I rested my head against his and said softly, “What aboutyoursafety? What about me wanting to stay to protect you?”

His hands pressed into me. “You saw yourself I have many who have my back.”

Jesus, he had the right answer to everything, but I still didn’t want to leave. I didn’t want to give in when it felt like he was.

I understood why Taro struggled, but I wanted to help him. I wanted to stand by his side and take everything on for him. I just didn’t know if it would be good or bad in the end.

Didheneed time to make sureIwas what he wanted? Or was the fear of losing someone consuming him? I knew he hated his father, but his death so close to this incident wouldn’t have helped his thoughts either.

I didn’t know what to do, what was right.

I unclenched my teeth, ignored the horrible feeling in my gut, and uttered, “Only for a little while?”Please don’t push me away. Please let me help. I wanted to say both, but I didn’t because he wanted this. He needed this.

He lifted his head, a sad smile touching his lips. “Yes. Very little.”

“Fine.” I nodded once. I hoped my answer eased some of his tension before he pressed his mouth to mine. He went to pull back, but I wasn’t having it. I gripped him to me and deepened the kiss. A promise to him that I still wanted this, that I would give him his time, for now.

Chapter Seventeen

Ruin

The ride home gave me a lot to think about. I understood why Taro pushed me to leave. He was under a shitload of stress, and I added to it since he worried about me. Even though he’d asked me to watch over Mimi, both of us knew the brothers would take care of her. Just like I knew Ryo and his men would protect Taro.

But fuck, it scared me to leave his side after what happened.

However, I believed we were strong; we could take on anyone wanting to fuck with us like we already had. Plus, we had good people at our backs, and hewouldbe safe. He would, else I’d kick arse if anything happened to him, and that was exactly what I told Ryo before I left. His dry reply had made me smile when he’d said, “It’s not like I’m new at this.”

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