Page 13 of Shuttered Hearts

“What’s your take on Declan?” I ask instead.

If Emily is surprised by my question, she doesn’t show it. “Do you want cream or sugar for your coffee?”

“No, black is fine.”

“Okay.” She puts the creamer she had in her hand back in the fridge. “I’m not ignoring your question, but I’m thinking this might be a longer conversation than the walk back to your dad’s room, so let’s sit.”

We walk over to the couches and get comfortable. Emily sits on one side of the sofa, her legs curled up under her, facing me as I mirror her position on the other side.

“Your brother met Declan one night at the bar shortly after your dad was first diagnosed with cancer. Both of them were going through their own thing. They got to talking and … well, they bonded instantly,” Emily explains.

“Caleb invited him to a family dinner shortly after that, and you know how your dad is. The second he found out Declan was new to town with no plans to leave, and that he wasn’t close with his parents, he wouldn’t leave Declan alone. Your dad demanded he come to all future family dinners and made sure he knew he was always welcome in his home.” She takes a sip of her coffee before continuing.

“And Declan, being the man I’ve learned he is, made himself available to all of us. He helped take your dad to appointments. He’d pick Max up from school when the rest of us couldn’t. He even helped build some of the addition to the house.”

I’m quiet, thinking about all she’s said.

“How is it that no one ever mentioned him to me before?” Wouldn’t they have mentioned him in passing if he had been around that much?

I remember when we added the addition to the back of the house. Dad’s treatments really took it out of him at the height of his first cancer diagnosis. He couldn’t make it up the stairs without taking multiple breaks because he got out of breath.

Caleb had still been in the middle of his intern year, making horrible money. Dad’s savings were non-existent, and his pension wasn’t even close to covering the costs of an addition.Dad and Caleb had talked about taking a second mortgage out on the house to pay for it, but I wouldn’t let them. I had sold a series of photos in one of my last exhibits at school for a decent amount of money, and had just landed an assignment at my first major publication in the city. Paying for that addition had been an easy way for me to help, since I hadn’t been home to give them my time.

“I don’t know. I think, at first, they avoided talking about how he was helping because they didn’t want you to feel bad about not being home.” Emily pauses, taking a breath. “Yes, all of them developed a deep friendship that had nothing to do with your dad’s cancer, but it was predominantly what kept him so close at first.”

And they would have been right. I still feel guilty thinking back to those years. It didn’t matter how often Dad would tell me he was proud of me. I always thought he looked at me and only saw my mother.

Emily continues before I can say anything. “Then I think it was just so normal for him to be around it never crossed their minds you didn’t already know about him.” She reaches over, places her hand on my forearm, and squeezes. “It was never an intentional thought to keep him a secret from you.”

“I know that,” I reassure her. “I guess I’m surprised his name was never mentioned in passing. Or maybe it was, and I missed it because it was so normal for all of you.” We are talking about five years here. There’s no way I remember every conversation we’ve had. “Though, if he was around as often as you say, I’m even more surprised I never met him on one of my trips home. I know they weren’t often or very long, but it’s not like I’ve been totally absent over the last five years.”

“Now that one, I can answer. Declan isn’t the closest with his parents, but he’s still close with his sister and a few friends back in his hometown,” Emily says, a smile forming on her face.“He still goes home, not often, but occasionally. Maybe by pure happenstance, your trips home always coincided with his trips home.”

“Yeah, maybe.” It should make me feel better, knowing there was someone to help them when they needed it and I couldn’t. And in a sense, it does comfort me to have that knowledge, but it also makes me feel like I’ve missed out on something.

“We should probably get back to Scott and Max,” Emily says, standing from the couch. She goes back over to the coffee pot to top off her cup, turning to me silently asking if I want to do the same. I shake my head at her before standing from the couch to follow her out the door.

I lookat my phone and realize we’ve been here longer than I thought. “Hey, bud, it’s getting late. We’ve got to get you home and ready for bed. We’ve both got school tomorrow.”

“I can go to bed late. I promise to get up and ready for school with no arguments tomorrow,” Max says from the bed. At some point after dinner, he climbed up into the bed with Dad, the two of them working through his homework.

“Listen to your sister, Max. I’ll be home in time for dinner tomorrow. Right, Emily?”

“Most likely. It might even be before Max gets home from school,” Emily confirms, back in the armchair across from Caleb and me.

“Okay,” Max says begrudgingly, carefully removing himself from Dad’s side. “I love you, Dad. See you tomorrow,” he says, giving him one more hug.

I step up to the side of the bed, giving Dad a quick peck on his forehead. “Love you. See you tomorrow.”

“I love you both too,” Dad says with a smile toward us.

“What about me? Where’s my hug?” Caleb says in mock outrage.

“You didn’t give me enough time! I was going to hug Emily first since she’s right here,” Max exclaims at Caleb before turning to Emily.

I smile down at my brother. “Yeah, geez. Give us a second.”

Caleb laughs as he stands and pulls me into a hug. “Love you, sis. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

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