Page 110 of Lucky Night

That’s better. Thank you. How are you doing, Barbara?

Well, uh…I’m not great.

A nervous laugh. Barbara sounds shaky, maybe elderly. How did they find her? Did she call into CNN? Who would do that?

Tell us what’s goingon.

I’m sorry, Nick, she says. It must have been hard, giving up your dream.

Oh, it’s fine, he says, already regretting his confession. His sad spewing. It was a long time ago. I have a good life. I can’t complain.

It’s not too bad here in my room, but when I look out the peephole, all I see is smoke.

And you still have the poetry, right? she says. You can enjoy it, even if it’s not your whole life.

The chyron reads:Woman Trapped on 33rd Floor Describes Deteriorating Conditions.

Oh no, he says. I don’t do that.

What do you mean?

I don’t read it anymore. Random lines come to me sometimes, when I…but no. I haven’t opened one of my old books in years.

You gave itup?

He doesn’t care for her tone. Or the way she’s looking at him with such disbelief. He goes to the minibar.

I was crushed, Jenny. My whole idea of what my life would be, who I was going to be, had changed. You say you’ve never lost, never experienced true grief? I have. When I went back and tried to read it, I was only reminded of what I’d lost.

What you gave up, she says. The idea of you quitting in the first place is surprising—

I know when to cut my losses.

But it was your dream, she says. You just let itgo?

I would have left, but they told us not to. They said there was no problem.

Who said that, Barbara? Was it the hotel, or the fire department?

Could you stop looking at me like that? he says.

I’m sorry, I just don’t get it. You had something you loved, enough to devote your life to it, but when it couldn’t be everything, you threw it away? That’s crazy.

What’s crazy, he says, controlling his temper with effort, is what you’re doing to me right now.

I keep trying the number they gave us, but I can’t get through. I’m in touch with my family, and they’re calling too. Nobody knows anything.

Once again, he says, I’ve offered some part of myself to you, I’ve exposed a vulnerability, and once again? You’re using it to attackme.

I’m not attacking you, I’m—

Oh, fuck off, Jenny! You are! I guess this is what you do, huh? Coax confidences out of people, so you can weaponize them?

I’m all alone up here, I…

Barbara breaks off. There’s a sound of quivery breathing. A whimper.

I’m just so scared.

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