Page 46 of My Big Fat Fake Alien

CHAPTER 21

RAVEN

The Grolgath’s head snaps back as my heel connects with the base of his skull. He hisses, a sound that’s more annoyed than pained, and rounds on me. His eyes narrow, slit pupils focusing on me like a predator spotting its next meal. I shrink back against the car seat, the leather cool against my skin, and glance out the shattered window. Karc’s golden scales glint in the sunlight as he pulls himself closer, his claws digging into the car’s undercarriage.

"Hey now," I say, holding up my hands. "Your boss Giscard wants me alive, remember? Killing me would be bad for your career."

The Grolgath’s tongue flicks out, tasting the air. "Yesss, but accidentssss do happen," he says, drawing out the sibilants like he’s auditioning for a bad horror movie.

I can’t help it. I laugh. "Oh, come on, dude. You don’t have to lean into the whole reptilian thing so hard. Giscard doesn’t sound like a snake with a lisp. He’s got class. You’re just trying too hard."

The Grolgath freezes, his expression shifting from menace to something almost...embarrassed. "That’sss not fair," he says, his voice quieter now. "I have a sssspeech impediment."

I blink, my laughter dying in my throat. "Wait, are you serious? Oh, shit. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to?—"

Before I can finish, Karc’s arm shoots through the broken window, his clawed hand gripping the Grolgath by the neck. The lizard-man’s eyes widen as Karc yanks him out of the car like he’s pulling a weed. The Grolgath flails, his claws scrabbling at Karc’s arm, but it’s no use. With a roar, Karc hurls him into open air.

"Sssssshit—" The Grolgath’s scream is cut off as he plummets toward the ground, his voice swallowed by the wind.

I lean out the window, my stomach lurching as I catch a glimpse of the city far below. "Did you just?—?"

"Focus," Karc growls, his voice sharp but steady. He swings himself into the car, his claws digging into the frame for balance. The car wobbles, the engine sputtering beneath us. "We need to land this thing before it explodes."

"Explodes?" I yelp, scrambling to buckle myself in. "Why didn’t you lead with that?"

"Because you were busy making friends with the Grolgath," he snaps, sliding into the driver’s seat. His scaled hands grip the wheel, his claws ripping through the leather as he wrestles the car into a controlled descent.

"I was distracting him so you could climb in!" I protest, clutching the seat for dear life as the car dips sharply. "It worked, didn’t it?"

"It worked," he admits grudgingly, his gaze fixed on the horizon. The city skyline rushes up to meet us, the buildings growing larger with terrifying speed. "But next time, maybe try not to insult the enemy’s speech patterns. It’s rude."

"Rude?" I choke out a laugh, even as my heart hammers in my chest. "Says the guy who just tossed him out of a moving car!"

Karc’s lips twitch, the closest thing to a smile I’ve ever seen from him. "I'm sure he can shapeshift his arms into wings or something."

The engine sputters again, and the car jerks violently. My stomach lurches as we drop another few hundred feet. "Karc?—"

The car jerks to a sudden stop, hanging motionless in mid-air. My heart skips a beat as I look at Karc. His golden scales shimmer under the sunlight streaming through the windshield, but his expression isn't reassuring.

"It wasn't me," he says.

A shadow falls over us, and I crane my neck to look up through the broken window. My mouth goes dry at the sight. A massive dark shape hovers above, sleek and alien. Blue-white light bathes our car in an ethereal glow.

"Is that what I think it is?"

"They're taking us into the ship," Karc says, his voice tight.

The car rises slowly, drawn upward by what has to be a tractor beam. My stomach does flip-flops as we ascend into a cavernous metal bay. The wedding dress rustles around my legs, and I almost laugh at how absurd this is. Here I am, still in my bridal gown, being abducted by aliens.

The car settles onto the hangar floor with a gentle thud. Cold, recycled air hits my face through the broken window. The metallic tang makes my nose wrinkle.

Twenty reptilian figures emerge from behind crates and vehicles, their rifle barrels trained on us. Their scales glisten under harsh overhead lights, a rainbow of colors from emerald to obsidian. The rifles in their clawed hands pulse with an ominous red glow.

"Don't move," Karc whispers. "Let me do the talking."

Karc throws his head back and laughs, the sound echoing off the metal walls of the hangar bay. My heart skips - I've never heard him make that sound before.

"You fools," he says, "you fell right into my trap. This car contains a powerful explosive device."

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