Page 18 of Kept By the Kraken

I do what I should have when I arrived and go to her. Tugging on her elbow, I spin her to me, hands finding the curve of her hip. Her mouth opens in an O of surprise, and she steadies herself with a palm to my chest. The movement crushes a bundleof flowers to me, and I tense at the sight of the violet crocus amid the white daisies.

“Where did you get those?” My words come out as a strangled whisper as I stumble away from her.

It can’t be.

Not those specific flowers.

“What?” she splutters.

The sight of those flowers flays me wide open.

“Where? Those don’t grow here.” The crocus isn’t native to the area, and I’ve never seen it here in my preserve.

“I found them on the trail. I woke up early, buzzing with energy”—she fidgets nervously—“and I knew we needed to talk, but I wanted to think first. I didn’t want to disturb you.”

She looks gutted, but I don’t know how to hold her pain and mine, how to be Thora’s mate and Penelope’s. How do I give myself over to my new bond when the ghost of my first mate haunts me? How can I ever take care of Penelope, keep her safe, when I couldn’t save my family before I was broken?

Penelope rocks forward, hesitant. “Bjorn? Are you all right?”

My chest shakes and my cheeks are wet. When did I start crying?

She caresses my cheek. “Bjorn?”

Without thought, my feelers curl up and wrap around her hand. “You found them?”

Her eyes, the same vibrant shade as the flowers she holds in her other hand, question me. “Yes. It was only these, growing in a patch near a clearing.”

My chest heaves in pain and in hope. These flowers are a sign.

“Why are they important? I want to know you. Help me understand why it feels like my own heart is breaking.” Tears fill her eyes and spill down her round cheeks.

“My wife and child.” The words hurt to say out loud.

She backs away, stumbling over her words. “But last night? Please tell me… we didn’t?—”

“They’re… gone.”

Penelope sucks in a sharp breath.

My hands fist at my sides. I look away from her horrified stare. “They’re dead because I didn’t protect my family, and now, I’ve claimed you as my mate when I don’t have a right to such a gift. I’m sorry?—”

“Woah. Slow down. One thing at a time. You had a family?” she asks softly.

It feels as if my innards are ripped out, my throat expelling the shameful truth. “Yes. I couldn’t save them?—”

Gentle arms hold me, her anchor the only thing keeping me from breaking into a thousand tiny pieces and scattering on the breeze. “What happened?”

Penelope deserves to know what kind of broken mate fate has saddled her with. I gather my courage and take a deep breath, opening the torrent of my memories. The gruesome images twist my insides, but I force myself to remember. “The Crusaders came for our village just as our ships were returning. We made it into our bay only to watch our home burn.

“They slaughtered our families, and the remaining warriors. We took to our Beasts and swam. But it was already too late. By the time we made it to shore, more knights spilled from the forest. I fell like my brothers, wounded by one of their blades, but I fled to the water.

“Instead of the honorable death I should have had on the battlefield, I woke again days later, washed up on a distant shore. I’m a coward, the gates of Valhalla closed to me. I shouldn’t have survived.”

“Oh, Bjorn. That loss. No one should have to face it, especially alone.” Penelope hangs on tightly, her fingers digging into my back.

Even if I don’t deserve it, I take her comfort and let it dull the pain. It’s the first time I’ve spoken of my home and my family since the Shifter Wars. Admitting my deepest shame felt like expelling poison, but it’s out now.

“And the flowers? They remind you of your family?” she whispers.

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