But hehadmade the difficult decision, and he had done it as his father wanted. How could he be an Akakios at AC International if Father was not in charge of his schooling? How could he expect to inherit a company if he spent his days being spoiled rotten by his indulgent and indifferent mother?
And so, he had chosen Constantine. And so, every summer spent with his mother had felt like torture. He had been cruel to her. In his teenage years, he had avoided her, ignored her, lashed out at her. In his early twenties, he had done his father’s bidding to do what he could to make sure she got as little money out of Constantine as possible.
He had not treated her well. He had failed her. But…
“Did I really cause you more harm than Constantine? That you would choose his side over mine?”
“If there are sides, you chose yours, Athan. Your father is a terrible man, but you’re on the same side. So… Does it matter whose side I get paid by? I’ll happily say something nasty about your father in the press for the right price. But don’t forget, Athan,youchose him.”
So did you.But he supposed that wasn’t fair, though he couldn’t quite articulate why. He only knew…he had made mistakes here. And he thought he had made some steps to rectify them, but apparently not.
“I am sorry, Mother. I have tried to make amends. I don’t understand why…” Athan didn’t have the words. He should have planned this out. He shouldn’t have called. “I do not need to pay you for any stories. That isn’t why I called.”
There was another moment of silence. Terse. Had she really expected a payday from both of them?
Probably.
“Then why did you call?”
To understand what I can do to make this right. To save myself from all my mistakes. To find redemption somewhere, maybe.“I suppose I simply needed to know,” he said to his mother.
She made a pained sound. “Why do you both torture me like this? Why am I always caught in some Akakios war? I only want to be left alone.”
And yet she’d taken Constantine’s money. Gone to the press. That was hardly being left alone, but who was he to judge?
“Very well, Mother. Goodbye.” He hung up. Then laughed at himself as he scrubbed his hands over his face. What a pointless endeavor. When would he ever learn?
He pushed away from his desk. He would find Lynna. They would have their public lunch, smiling and acting as though nothing mattered. He would ignore this story and it would go away. It didn’t matter. All that mattered was winning enough shares to kick Constantine out. To fix AC.
You couldn’t count on people, but you could depend on a business you controlled.
He stepped out of his office, and immediately saw Lynna a few meters down the hallway. She was standing with Henry Davies, they were smiling as they chatted. She seemed to glow like the sun.
He stopped for a moment, struck by…her. The sight of her, thefeelingthat worked its way through him every time he saw her. More potent, more impossible to ignore by the day.
He did not believe in love. But he remembered how quietly and earnestly she’d told him her parents had loved each other back on their first drive to his home in Athens.
So maybe it was love, here inside of him, but what could he do with it? She hated him. She was here for Rhys, for her father’s name, and he… He knew what he was. No matter how he tried to make himself into a good man, his past mistakes would always be there. Would always define him.
There was no forgiveness in this world, that he knew. His mother had proven it to him.
Lynna lifted her head, and her smile did not dim. She waved him over. An invitation into the sunshine that seemed to surround her. Thestrengthshe exuded.
It could never be his, he knew. His failures would always be there in the way. Even if she set them aside for this short marriage, it would not be forever. There would be no miracle of forgiveness because miracles did not exist.
So he did not havehope, but what he did have was time. A little time to pretend that he could be forgiven, that he could be a good man. So, much like he’d said to Lynna last night, why not enjoy while it was here in front of him?
It would all end soon enough, regardless.
He moved down the hall, fixing a bright smile on his face. “Are you up for lunch, Henry?” He slid his arm around Lynna’s waist easily enough, and she didn’t even stiffen. It felt natural, and right.
“I’m afraid I can’t today. You two should go enjoy yourselves. You hardly took a honeymoon. Enjoy the time you have before you start a family.” The man winked, then walked away.
Lynna had stiffened at the wordfamily, and he felt a little stiff himself. Though he’d never considered such a thing, just the word seemed to conjure images of blue eyes in small dark-haired children.
Horrifying.
Hewantedit to be horrifying.