She tipped her head to the side, blinking at me. “Can I ask you a question first?”
“Sure.”
“You’ve had dreams like this before, haven’t you?”
“I often do when I’m working a homicide investigation.”
“Are they much the same?”
“They’re not, though this one is far less confusing.”
“In what way?”
I thought about the easiest way to explain it.
“This one is a lot clearer,” I said.
“There’s a reason for that, don’t you think?”
I turned toward her. “I don’t follow.”
“You’ve never fully acknowledged these dreams.”
“Yes, I have.”
“What I mean to say is, you don’t acknowledge they are anything more than your subconscious working overtime to understand things you’re confused about.”
I struggled to grasp her meaning.
“I’ve had dreams like these the majority of my life, starting when I was a child,” I said. “I’ve always known they have a deeper meaning, but I don’t always understand their interpretation.”
“There are few in life you trust enough to share these dreams with, and when you do, you treat the dreams as if they’re an extension of your subconscious. Maybe that’s why they don’t serve you in the way they could.”
It felt as though she was trying to tell me something, but whatever it was, she wasn’t coming right out and saying it.
“What is it you want me to know?” I asked.
“Have you ever considered you have a gift, something bigger than your physical self that you tap into when you need it the most?”
“I’ve never given it enough thought one way or the other.”
“Of course you have. It’s on your mind, even now. And still, you don’t trust it enough to fully immerse yourself.”
“I never said I don’t trust it.”
“You’ve never said you do. Why not?”
“If I admit these dreams are more than the fabric of my imagination, it would make me question myself,” I said. “It would make me feel like it means I’m not normal.”
“You’re so much more than normal, and your gift ... not only should you trust it, but you should also lean into it, taking thewisdom and using it to assist you along the way. Only then will you see things with a lot more clarity.”
I was starting to wonder if we were ever going to circle back to her murder.
“I’ll give it some thought,” I said.
“I’m glad.”
“Can we talk about the night you died?”