Page 95 of From Asher, With Love

“Good.”

Chris gives his son a smile, and my chest tightens, seeing the love he has for Asher. My heart aches for something I never had with my own, and suddenly, I need air.

“I’ll give you both time to catch up,” I say to both men.

They both give me a smile, and Asher kisses the back of my hand before letting me go.

I step out of the room and wander the house before the housekeeper escorts me upstairs and into Asher’s old bedroom.A sadness drags me down, glimpses of mine and Asher’s past colliding with our present.

Loving Asher has always been easy despite the pain that comes with it, but being in Asher’s old bedroom makes me realize losing him for those ten years may have torn us apart, but Asher found beauty in his life. He needed to lose me to find himself. He found happiness. A happiness that kept him breathing.

When I sit on the edge of the bed and look around, though, taking in the pieces of Asher’s life I thought I’d never get to see, exhaustion takes hold, pulling me under. I lay back on the pillow and allow sleep to take over.

THIRTY-TWO

CHARLEIGH

One Month Later

Asher and I stayed with his father until the end. I’d just returned to Chris’s house after running to a farmer’s market I spotted along the beach when I came home to Asher standing at the end of the hall.

Tears streamed down his face, and his body sagged as if he’d been carrying the weight of the world on his back. The gold flecks in his eyes dimmed, and it was then that I knew.

Christopher Egan was gone.

I ran to Asher, and he swept me up in his arms. I placed my hands around his face and told him to let me in, to share in his pain, so he didn’t feel like he had to carry it all.

This time, he did.

He wrapped his large arms around me and just held me, with my legs curled around his waist, as if he was going to fall apart if he didn’t. He sobbed into my shoulder, then took me into his father’s room.

Chris looked like he was in a deep sleep when I lifted his hand and kissed the back of it. I leaned down and whispered in his ear, thanking him for loving me like his own daughter in thefew short weeks I’d known him. I thanked him for showing me how it felt to be truly loved by a father.

Then Asher and I spread a few of his ashes along his favorite beach in Santa Barbera, as he’d asked us to do, before bringing him back home to New York with us.

It’s been three days since we left California, and the fall chill in the New York air is already biting at my skin, but it feels good to be home. It feels good to be home in Asher’s apartment, with pieces of Chris still lingering in the hallways.

Cracking my eyes open, I twist in my bed, turning to Asher’s side. The sheets are pulled back, leaving the space where he left earlier. I run my hand over the silky sheets, excited to get back to work today.

Asher hasn’t returned to his job since we’ve come back home, but he’s taking his time. I can tell his father’s loss has hit him hard—harder than he expected.

For now, he’s promised to come down to my new flower shop to help me plan out the details of how I’ll be setting it up.

I turn back over and grab my phone from my nightstand.

My girl’s chat is blowing up, the constant pinging too annoying for someone who hasn’t had their first sip of coffee yet.

Julianna: Honestly, it’s about time you’ve added her to the chat.

Selene: I wasn’t sure if London wanted to be included.

Julianna: Wow, Selene. Are you trying to keep your sister hidden from your best friends?

Selene: Of course not. It’s just that she doesn’t live here, and I didn’t want to flood her phone with our never-ending messages.

London: Which you’re both doing right now. LOL, but I don’t mind. Thank you for including me.

Julianna: I’ve got your back, London, and so does Charleigh. If that girl ever wakes up.

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