Page 52 of For Pleasure Or Worse

"I don't understand why you would keep it from me," I lamented anyway. "If it wasn't something you were worried about."

"I was embarrassed." She laughed at herself. "I am still embarrassed. Prenups are for couples who expect things to fail. My family values material things over their relationships. God forbid they lose their second house, but you can always find someone new to marry."

"We are not like them, Tal," I said sternly. "We got together and that was it. It was like the stars were aligning. We knew, from the very first date. And your family can't fathom that. They don't know what it feels like to be so sure."

Her eyes fluttered closed, wet lashes long against her cheeks. She looked absolutely endearing under the pale blue moonlight. "They're never going to. It's going to be a struggle for the rest of our lives. You're going to have to deal with them to be with me, and that scares me, Matty."

“I don't understand.” My chest grew hollow, a large valley with wind whistling through it.

"We're strong right now, because whether we like to admit it or not, this is still new. We haven't been together long enough to test all these things. Now, we're starting to see how hard it can get and you’re getting a taste of the bullshit I've dealt with my entire life. I'm scared that you're going to resent it eventually. And I can't help but wonder, am I worth all of this? Am I worthy of you? Am I capable of being the wife you deserve?—"

"Stop." I was wearing a hole into the inside of my cheek. "Would I be treading water in dress attire in your parents' ridiculous pool right now if you weren't worth it?"

Her lips thinned.

"Your perception of worth is irrelevant," I said. "Do you want it? Want me?"

"Of course I do."

"Life is never going to be perfect. It's going to be really fucking hard. We're going to hit bumps. Our families are going to drive us to drink. I'm going to annoy the hell out of you one day, and then the next call your dad a sad son of a bitch and threaten to hurt him if he upsets you ever again.”

Her eyes glistened. "You did that?"

"I would do anything for you," I said. "Including signing a prenup, if that's really what you wanted. Because if I'm ever stupid enough to make you want to divorce me, you can have everything I'm worth. All of it.”

"I need an outlet.” A lightness had returned to her and she curled into my chest, resting her head on my shoulder. "Some way to let this all out without screaming so loud I break glass."

"I am more than happy to take a rage riding from you, sweetheart."

Tally laughed, a little huff pushing from her nostrils. Anytime I amused her was like a pat on the back. "Tell me it won't always be this way," she sniffled, her warm breath skittering across the exposed skin on my neck.

"I swear it, Tally. Do you know what Duran means? It means endure. You were meant to have this name, because it's what you do. It's what we will always do, together.”

Her upturned lips parted and her teeth scored my skin, then she turned in my arms and kissed me. A ‘thank you, I needed this' kiss. She seemed better, having worked through the moment, but there was something remaining. Something in her body language I couldn't pick apart.

"No more secrets, all right?" she proposed. "You're not going to get denied our marriage license because you married someone twelve years ago while you were drunk in the military and never filed a legal divorce, right?"

I jokingly pondered it and she elbowed me. "No, Tal."

"Good. I want us to be on the same page. Vegas is creeping up fast, and we don't need any more hiccups.”

For a moment I thought about TechOps, and the work piling up while I put off hiring. How I was brushing off my mental lapses to avoid acknowledging a bigger problem. They weren’t secrets, they were choices I had to make to keep the wheel turning smoothly. I was also convinced my parents had a significant effect on me, and the second they were back in New York, everything would return to normal. It was different. It was my mess. It didn't involve both of us.

"You're the boss," I settled on. "Now, can we get out of this pool before we both catch pneumonia?"

"That sounds like something your mom would say."

“How dare you.” I pinched her ass as she swam to the steps but we both stopped short as Natalia’s father stumbled out the back doors of the mansion and onto the patio. He trudged toward the side of the pool house, unbuttoning his dress shirt and mumbling something unintelligible and whiny as we watched on, completely undetected, intensely fascinated. He reached a thatch of neatly landscaped bushes, keeled over with his hands on his knees, and vomited into them.

Entirely unsurprised, Natalia clicked her tongue. "Damn it, Mia was spot on with that.”

chapter eighteen

Mateo

Me

Any of you bringing a date to the wedding?

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