Page 71 of Cut Me Down

More shakily than I expected, I sit on my ass facing away from him as instructed. I don’t know what to expect. He hasn’t hurt me yet. I shouldn’t be so afraid of him, but my body is just reacting in a way I can’t control. The warmth from his body is usually comforting, and even now, I don’t feel any anger seething out of him like I would from Cooper.

However, my anxiety is running so fast it’s refusing to let the warmth in this time. I feel my eyes burn as tears try and creep their way in. My mind believes he wouldn’t hurt me, but my shaky limbs and anxiety filled chest tell me otherwise.

To my surprise, he lightly grabs the brush out of my hands and begins grazing it through my hair. Ensuring he’s being careful enough not to push on my scalp too hard or tear my hair. I shakily inhale as the comforting feeling tries to take over my senses. Forcing my body to relax and causing my nerves to come to a screeching halt.

“I don’t care what you wear, baby. I want you to wear whatever you feel comfortable in. Whatever you feel beautiful in. Me? I think you look sexy as fuck, but I want you to feel likeyou. No matter what that looks like. If another man can’t control himself, that’s a lesson I need to teach him. Not you, little wolf.” A tear falls from the water pooling in my eyes and rolls down my cheek as he runs his fingers through my hair and drags them across my scalp in a loving manner.

Tingles ripple their way down my neck and back, only serving to prolong my relaxation. Once all of the knots are gone from my hair, he gently puts a few fingers under my chin and lifts it up so I can look up at him as he wipes the lone tear with the pad of his thumb.

“I told you Ashia, you get every choice other than being with me. I won’t make you suffer for making them.” He reaches down and kisses my forehead. Allowing his lips to linger there for longer than necessary. “I figured you would be nervous and wouldn’t want to try to eat yet. So, I made you a smoothie. It’s on the counter. If you get hungry for real food you make me pull over and stop somewhere, okay?” I nod my head in his hands before he weaves his arms around my body and stands up, dragging me up with him and setting me on my feet like a rag doll. He then turns me in one smooth motion to face. “Are you ready?” He asks me.

“Sure.” The word slides between my lips so quietly, I’m not even sure he heard me. My mind is nothing but a fog of awe as I stare into his endearing, ocean blue eyes. Did this man really just brush my hair, and make me something because he knew how I’d react? That’s very…sweet. Thismanof a man really just sat me down and brushed my hair? It felt soothing. I'm not sure besides hair classes in school I’ve ever had anyone else brush my hair. It felt…nice. Good, even.

He leads me out of the apartment by placing his hand in the lower curve of my back. Gently pushing me forward as if I was about to perform something in front of a crowd and needed confidence. We make our way outside and up to his bike. Which is even more intimidating up close. It’s height comes up above my hips, and now I'm terrified to get on it.

I watch as he grabs the second helmet attached to the back of the bike and walks up to me.

“Have you ever ridden on a motorcycle before?” He asks, and all I can do is shake my head. “Just try to keep your weight centered. You can hold onto me if that helps.” He pushes my hair behind my ears with one hand and then fits the helmet over my head. It’s thick and hard, yet the inside is soft and comforting. Like a pillow was being squished on the sides of my skull. I feel like a bobble head with the extra weight, but I suppose it’s better to be safe than sorry. “How does that feel? Snug?” He adjusts the buckle under my chin, and makes sure it’s on tight enough. “I tried to get one that looked like it’d fit.” My eyes snap back to him in wonder. Get one? He didn’t already have this?

“You bought this for me?” He smiles at my innocent tone.

“Of course, I did. I’m not letting my girlfriend ride without a helmet.” I look at his eyes through the helmet, and even with the tint partially blocking the swirling colors, he looks so sincere.

“It fits great, thank you.” My voice is now muffled by the helmet, but I think he heard me.

“You’re welcome, baby girl.” He kisses the top of the helmet and grabs his jacket. To my surprise, he turns back to me and holds the jacket up. “It’s going to be chilly tonight.” He slides his jacket around me and over my arms. Settling me in the comfort of his warmth and scent. The leather is a nice addition, and I don’t resist the urge to bring it closer to my nose and inhale deeply. My heartbeat instantly begins to slow as the heat from his sweet gestures takes over my body.

Walking over to the bike, he sits first. Throwing his large, toned leg over the seat, and then holding his arm out. I grab onto his firm bicep and throw my leg over the bike. Mimicking his movements and nestling in the middle. He puts my smoothie, that I completely forgot about, into the side bag, and once I see he’s getting ready to start the bike I wrap my arms around him. Interlocking my hands at his stomach and squeezing so hard that my knuckles turn white.

It’s almost as if it startles him, the way he pauses, but then he gently rubs my hands with one of his large ones a couple of times and starts the bike up. The rumbling shakes my entire body, and my stomach along with it. I’ve never felt such a strong engine directly beneath me, and it’s almost too intimidating to bear.

I lay my head on his back to ground myself to something equally as strong when he reaches into his pocket, grabs his phone, and taps on it. An endearingly aggressive rock song plays through small speakers in my helmet, and I’m assuming his as well. Giving a soothing distraction and ambiance to our ride.

When we jerk away, I feel my heart try to plummet, and my grip on him tightens. As if in this moment nothing could protect me better than he could. Not even the helmet. The first minute of our drive is terrifying. Every turn he makes, I feel like I'm going to fall off. Leaning side to side with the bike is one of the most unnerving experiences, and it is definitely not helping the uneasiness of my nerves. Once we get to longer stretches of road though, it’s actually soothing. The rumbling doesn’t feel as intense, and my stomach no longer feels like it’s either in my throat or my ass.

I can still smell him through the breeze, and his warmth on my body engulfs me like a comforting blanket. I press myself into him more as the breeze gets cooler from the sun setting, and I feel as he ever so gently leans back to lessen the distance even more. My stomach drops a little as he takes one hand off of the handles, but my comfort is restored when he puts his hand on top of mine, caressing the back of it and down my arm as he continues to drive.

It’s not too long before there’s nothing but trees and corn fields overtaking the backdrop. I had almost forgotten how quickly the city ends and agriculture begins here. The tall buildings are replaced by the view of the mountains, and there’s not fire hydrants or meticulously placed shrubbery. Just grass, crops, and open fields. Its peaceful, and the fresh air is a renewing force for my lungs.

After about another ten minutes, he turns down a dirt road that leads up to the mountains and into the trees. I look over and up to his face, and he looks so menacing, so alluring, in the blue toned shadows. The reflection of the trees is speeding through his visor, almost to where I can’t see where he’s looking. Yet I feel his eyes on mine. This man is that enraptured in me that he can’t even focus while he drives this pristine motorcycle, and that causes the butterflies in my stomach to somersault.

Looking off to the left, I notice a sea of cars and trucks, with lots of people walking away from us and towards what looks like two big stages in the distant, hacked down corn field. Spotlights and speakers are hung up high, and among the sea of vehicles are perfectly placed food trucks and seating. The realization of what he’s taking me to breeds a different electricity in my veins, and I almost can’t contain my excitement.

We pull up to park the bike, and I almost fall from hopping off so quickly, to be sure the sign says what I think it does. I jerk my helmet off to take in the large, spray painted “Battle of the Bands” sign in all of its glory. It’s been a tradition in the city for years that local bands, and some larger bands that come through town, have pop-up concerts. Rarely is there one anymore, much less two bands playing. The last ‘Battle of the Bands’ that happened was five years ago, and I missed ‘I Prevail’ and a local band duke it out.

“Are you serious!?” I yell out in exasperation and allow the full smile that has taken over my face to shine. “I never hear about these until the next morning, how did you know!?” He walks up to me, takes his helmet off and leans into my ear.

“I'm DH baby, I know everything that happens in and around this city.” He kisses my cheek. “I thought you'd enjoy it from your Spotify playlists.” Is this man ever going to stop surprising me? I'm going to take a wild guess and say no. He says I'm his, so you would think that meant that he wouldn’t have to try and win me over, yet he continuously tries to do so. Whether it be continuous flowers, breakfast and coffee in the mornings, late night comforts, and now a concert date? Every night since my taste in coffee escalated, he’s told me about what he did for work that day, how they operate and what they plan to do. He’s opening up to me with every gesture, and I'm taking it all in like a greedy child.

“This is amazing! Thank you. So, so much.” I look up to his gaze, and it’s like his eyes would smile for him, if he didn’t already have a large smirk on his face.

“You never have to thank me. For anything. Okay?” I sheepishly nod my head, and after he puts our helmets down on the bike, he places his hand on the curve of my back once again, and leads us towards the crowd.

Chapter twenty-five

Damien

‘Take Me Back to Eden’ – Sleep Token

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