Page 101 of Courage, Dear Heart

I tap my gloved fingers on the desk. “Come on, come on, come on.”

Done. I delete the folder I created and then delete it again from the Recycle Bin. And that’s when I see something that grabs my attention. A couple dozen or so PNG files with my name and dates. “What the fuck?”

I create a new folder on the desktop and drag them all into it. Search for more. Find nothing else. I open one of the files. It’s a picture of me and Jillian standing close in front of her shop. I close the image. Move the new folder to the drive. Wait for the transfer to end and delete it. Then go back to the Recycle Bin and clear the folder I deleted earlier.

I pause, breathe. Look around. Make sure everything is in place. Shut everything down, return the chair to its place. Grab my phone and the flashlight, leave the room, and close the door behind me.

The elevator dings as I reach my office. I freeze. My heart thunders in my ears. I get inside and close the door as quietly as I can. Turn off the lamp on my desk.

Retreat to the side and lie on the sofa, where I can’t be seen from the glass pane next to the door. If someone walks in, I can fake sleep.

I hold my breath as someone walks past my door.

FIFTY-SEVEN

Jillian

I expectedElliott to call me today, but he didn’t. It’s hard not to feel like I got the after-sex brush-off. I know that’s not it. I don’t believe that’s what Elliott is doing. He’s not ignoring me after our first time together because he wants out. I think it has something to do with his father and what I heard this morning.

The more I think about it, the surer I become.

My previous text to him has gone unanswered. I check my phone again.

Jillian: Hi. Is everything okay? You looked upset this morning.

Jillian: Please call me when you have a chance.

I’ve contemplated texting him again. Or even calling. He read my texts. Two is my limit. I refuse to be a needy girlfriend sending multiple messages.

Girlfriend? Is that what I am? I thought so, but I’m feeling more and more like a hookup. I don’t want to call Sheila and talk about it either. Last thing I need is for her to go into attack mode and rip Elliott a new one for not getting back to me after we got together last night. I don’t want to regret what we did. I wanted to be with him. I feel like I can breathe again. This is the happiest I’ve been since the accident.

I should go to sleep. I doubt he’ll be calling me now. It’s getting late. I do my night routine of checking locks, turning lights off, and making sure everything is as it should be. Check on Daisy and go into Jamie’s room and turn off the night-light. I smile. My boy is healing. We both are. And I know part of it is because of Elliott. Because I changed. And even if Jamie is too young to understand exactly what’s happening, he can see and feel the changes.

I settle into bed and grab my Kindle. I’ll try to read for a bit. Get my mind off Elliott and his lack of response.

My phone buzzes. I reach for it, my heart drumming.

Not Elliott. Leonora.

I forgot I texted her earlier. After talking to Sheila and that ominous conversation I heard, I decided to send Leonora a message to check on her.

Leonora: Hi dear. Is it too late for me to call you?

Jillian: Not at all. You can call me.

My phone buzzes again, and I answer. “Hi, Leonora. How are you?”

“Oh, I’m fine. You know, as good as it gets at my age.” Her voice is clear, but it has a tinge of frailty to it.

I smile. “I hope I’ll be as cool and put together as you are at your age.”

“You’ll be miles above me. You’re made of tough stuff. But I know you didn’t message me for idle chat. What can I do for you, dear?”

I nibble on my thumb. Hesitate for a moment. “It’s about the building.”

“I guessed as much. Are those bastards still trying to bribe you?”

“Yes and no. I haven’t gotten any offers in the last couple of months. But I think they’re up to something.”

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