Page 123 of Courage, Dear Heart

“Let’s go.” She’s already heading down the sidewalk.

“Where?”

She points down the road. “There’s a playground around the corner.” We walk in silence until we get to the small park.

She sets Jamie down. “Want to go play?”

He nods and runs off. We walk down a path on the grass. A few other kids are here and small groups of two and three mothers sit together, talking and sipping coffee. Their gazes track us.

Jamie runs to a group of boys playing with a frisbee and joins them. Jillian points to an empty bench in the shade and we make our way to it.

We sit and the two-foot space between us feels like miles. “Thank you for talking to me. I was afraid you wouldn’t.”

“And if I didn’t?” She doesn’t look at me.

I try to smile and fail. “I have open return tickets. I guess I’d keep trying until you did.”

She sits back, her shoulders slumping. “What are you doing here, Elliott?”

“I came for you. And Jamie.”

Her eyes are fixed on me now. “Yes, but why? You don’t need to court me anymore. Your firm got the building.”

Her words are like a slap to the face. I hoped I could get to her first, explain before she found out that Leonora sold the building. “You know that was never my intention.”

“Do I?”

“Yes, you do. Everything I told you, every moment between us, was true.Istrue. I don’t care about the building. I never did. I’ve only ever cared about you and Jamie.”

She looks at me for a long time and then finds Jamie playing and laughing with the other boys. Her face softens. “I heard from the fire chief. The report ruled it an accidental electrical fire. The wiring, it seems, was too old.”

“I’ve heard.”

“And Leonora has been in touch with the insurance. It may take a month or two, but they will pay for loss and damages. She said the building is pretty close to being a total loss and she decided to sell it because she’s not in a position to deal with what it takes to rebuild it.”

There’s so much I want to say, but I can’t. Not yet. I take her hand and she lets me hold it. “I want you to come back to New York with me. I miss you and Jamie. Daisy too. How is she?”

She shakes her head. “I had to leave Daisy with Sheila. My mother . . .”

She doesn’t finish whatever she was going to say, but after meeting her mother, I can imagine. I start laughing.

She narrows her eyes at me.

“Your mother, the look on her face when you walked out and shut the door.”

Now she’s laughing too. We’re both in hysterics. Shewipes at her eyes. “I’m going to pay for that.” She sighs. “I can’t wait to get out of here, but I have to stay a little longer.”

I sober. “You’re coming back, then? For sure?”

“Yes, we’ll go back before Labor Day. Jamie starts first grade a couple of days after.”

Hope blooms inside me. “You can stay with me.”

She shakes her head. “No, I can’t. I’ll be with Sheila for a few days. I already found a new apartment. Near my old place, so Jamie doesn’t have to transfer to a different school district.”

I nod. “And us?”

“What about us?”

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