Page 124 of Courage, Dear Heart

Her response is like a stab to my heart. “Please don’t do this. Please.”

“What am I doing, Elliott? You say you want me, but you work for the devil. Your father must be so happy about the fire that took everything I built and worked for. He finally got his building.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t want any of this to happen.” I want to tell her everything, but I can’t. Not yet.

She scoffs but doesn’t say a word.

“I have this.” I reach for the large envelope I placed next to me on the bench. “I hate to do this now, but it needs to be done. I need your signature.” I retrieve a sheet of papers from the envelope and a pen.

She sighs. “I knew this was coming, but I didn’t think anyone would fly to Ohio and hunt me down for it.” She takes the pen and papers. “What am I signing?”

“This is for your part of the building. And this is from Leonora.” I give her a sealed envelope.

She opens the envelope. When she finishes reading, shelooks at me and reads the letter again. “It is her handwriting, that much I can tell from years of working with her.”

I get a glimpse of the handwriting, but I have no idea what Leonora wrote to her.

“Let me see those papers.” Jillian skims through the pages and then signs it. “I know it’s really stupid of me to sign this without having a lawyer go through it first, but Leonora signed it, and her letter tells me to trust you and sign it too. Not that I have a choice. I need to sign if I want to see the insurance money.”

I search her face. “About us?—”

“I have to go back before my mother calls the police and reports a kidnaping.” She cuts me off.

“She wouldn’t.”

“The only thing keeping her from doing that or running after me calling my name on the street is her fear of being embarrassed in front of her neighbors.”

“Can we please talk, figure us out?”

She shakes her head. “I can’t do this now, Elliott. I’m still hurting—it’s all too much. You show up here with papers for me to sign my life away, my future with my child. I can’t.”

“Jillian—”

She stands up, the moment abrupt, cutting me off.

I stand up too. “I’m not going anywhere until we talk. I got a hotel room not far from your parents’ house. I’ll keep coming for you.”

She takes a step away from me. “Jamie? Time to go.”

He comes running.

Jillian lowers her voice. “Say your goodbyes to him now. We’ll walk home alone.”

I hug Jamie and ruffle his hair as something falls apartinside me. But I keep a smile on my face for his sake. “See you soon, okay?”

She takes his hand and turns to leave.

“Jillian, I lo?—”

Her step falters. “I’ll call you.”

They walk away, and it takes every fiber of my being not to go after them.

SEVENTY-TWO

Jillian

We havethe entire place for ourselves, Jamie and me. It’s been torture knowing Elliott is so close and not seeing him. But I promised myself to wait a couple of days until I acted. Give myself the time I need to think. It’s fitting that I’m here now—the place that started it all. My elementary school playground. We hopped over the four-foot chain-link fence enclosure. No one is here to tell us we can’t. No one around to see me and my son, but the birds chirping above. Not when school won’t start until after Labor Day. And not when it’s Sunday morning and everyone is in one church or another, attending service. I refused to go, much to my mother’s chagrin. Years ago, I would have caved to her insistence. Not anymore. I’m a different person now.

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