Page 32 of Courage, Dear Heart

“Me too. Let’s go find some food.” I squat in front of Jamie. “You want to go on my shoulders again?”

He doesn’t hesitate.

After lunch and lots more animals, we take a break and make an ice cream stop. Jamie dives into his cone and a spot of vanilla gets on his nose. Jillian smiles as she reaches over to wipe it off. The sight of her—relaxed, laughing, genuinely happy—brings warmth I can’t shake. And then she glances up at me, our eyes meeting, and for a split second, I wonder if she feels it too. That spark, that connection I keep trying to contain.

As we make our way toward the exit, Jamie asks to go to the bathroom and Jillian takes him. I’m waiting outside when I spot a balloon stand. I buy a parrot balloon for Jamie. His eyes widen when he sees me holding it out for him. He takes it, nodding his thanks in that quiet way of his, and I reach out to give his shoulder a small squeeze. There’s something powerful in these simple gestures, in knowing how grateful he is for such a small gesture. Small children are always truthful.

Jillian touches my bicep, and it involuntarily flexes as she trails down my arm and takes my hand. Right before we reach the car, she stops, glancing up at me. “We had a great time. Thank you.”

“I did too. I’d love to do something like this again whenever you’re free.”

“I think I’d like that. And Jamie too. And maybe...just the two of us another time too?”

I meet her gaze. My heart does sprints again. She surprises me. I don’t want her to think I’d ever exclude Jamie but can’t deny that I want to spend time with her, the two of us, alone. This is a big step for her. I love that she’s taking charge. Her bravery touches me.

“Absolutely.” I keep my voice soft to hide my excitement, my hand squeezing hers. “Whenever you’re ready.” I hope she’s moving forward and maybe—just maybe—she’s letting me in.

Digital Chemistry

Elliott: First concert you ever went to?

Jillian: Taylor Swift. The Speak Now Tour. And no judgment!

Elliott: No judgment, my sisters love her. Mine was Metallica.

Jillian: I still have the ticket for it. Saved on a memory box somewhere.

Elliott: I would go to a Taylor Swift show with you.

FOURTEEN

Jillian

“I come bearinggifts of food for your nourishment.” Sheila presents a brown bag like it’s a crown sitting on a velvet pillow.

I smile and call out to Angela. “I’ll take my lunch now. Hold the fort.”

“Aye aye, captain.” Angela gives me a mock salute.

Sheila waves at me to follow her upstairs. “I can’t believe you made me wait until Saturday to tell me what happened.”

“I can’t help if you’re working across town. You know I like to talk in person better. How else can I see your face?”

“Girl, there’s this thing called FaceTime.”

I laugh. “Not the same. Thank you for bringing us lunch.” I open the brown paper bag and find two Gyro sandwiches and an extra tzatziki sauce from one of my favorite places. My mouth waters.

Sheila sits across from me at the table.

“Okay, spill it. I waited a week for you to tell me whathappened on your date.” Sheila takes a loud slurp from her can of soda.

Dozens of images flash behind my eyes and I press a napkin to my mouth to hide a smile before my too perceptive friend jumps to conclusions I’m not ready to verbalize yet.

She takes a huge bite of her sandwich and nods at me to speak.

I sip my drink and tell her about our day at the zoo and Jamie taking a picture of us.

Her eyes widen. “This I must see. Show me the picture.”

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