Page 17 of Primal

Like the punchline of a bad joke, everyone in the conference room goes still, silence falling over us like a wet blanket. Every gaze locks onto me. In another scenario, being the center of attention wouldn’t faze me. I’d take it in stride, but right now it feels very much like the most intimate parts of me have been laid bare only to be picked apart.

It’s my right-hand man, and the person I’d much rather be discussing this privately with, who breaks the tense moment. “What do you mean you don’t know?” Canaan questions beside me, the concern in his hazel eyes unchecked.

“For the sake of your pack’s omegas, I’d figure it out—and fast—Fallamhain,” Cathal drawls, slowly standing from the leather rolling chair he’s been using as his personal throne since we gathered in here. The man is built like a typical alpha male,tall and burly, but years of inactivity has made his middle soft. His gut that is tucked into a dark green button-down shirt hangs slightly over his brown belt. “We don’t want that number to increase to eight, do we?”

“This shouldn’t be up for discussion.” Yrsa steps forward again, the handful of council members who were also big supporters of the alliance with the McNamara Pack watching her closely. It was these four that were the most hesitant to lend their support when I took over as Alpha. This agreement is what brought me into their good graces and helped stop them from seeing me as the cocky teen I think the remembered me as. “Since Cathal’s men took up station as extra guards along the northern edge and began closely monitoring the border between here and Canada, we’ve only lost one omega. Before their help? We lost six in half as many months. Mate or not, you would be a fool to put this alliance at risk.”

Her supporters nod their heads in silent agreement.

And that right there is the reason this deal with Pack McNamara was originally proposed. The border. My pack is sizable, strong, but insular. Self-reliant to a fault. We’ve spent generations thriving within our own borders, but that isolation left us vulnerable the moment outside threats started slipping through and stealing our omegas.

I inherited a fortress without a network of allies to call upon.

There was only Cathal McNamara.

He’s been a friend of my pack’s—of my father’s—for half a lifetime. Our packs’ history and mutual trust made taking him up on his offer for support the most sensical option. Especially since I’d stepped into this role as Alpha unexpectedly, without any of my own forged alliances to bring to the table. It wasn’t until I left for college and met Rook Draven that I formed my first friendship with someone outside of our pack.

Rook’s pack doesn’t have the extra manpower to spare. With no other connections to exploit, I was left to rely on the one partnership my father had bothered to nurture during his era.

Admitting we needed help was a blow to our pride—my pride as our new leader—but the reality was clear, we couldn’t watch both sides of the border alone. Four of our missing omegas had been tracked that far, but once they reached the boundary line between the two countries, their trails vanished. We needed help from those who knew that side of the border better than we did. And we needed whoever is trafficking these poor souls to know that their route is being watched on both sides.

As it stands now, the extra support has greatly slowed down the number of missing persons. I know this. Yrsa knows this, but that does not give her the right to speak to me in such a way.

“It would do you all well,” I say, my voice measured, as I slowly scan the room, locking eyes with everyone present until they drop their gaze to the floor, “to remember that your role is toadviseyour pack Alpha, not tocommandhim. It is not your place to demand anything of me. To order me to act.” I let the silence stretch, let the weight of them settle. “Every choice I make, personal or not, is made with thewell-being and stabilityof this pack in mind. And if that isn’t already clear to you, then you haven’t beenfucking paying attention. I’ve done everything I can to show I’m worthy of your support, but I’m growing tired of constantly needing to prove it. You hold your positions because I value your insight and believe your guidance can help me be a better leader. But make no mistake, I am more than capable of doing this job without your input.”

Yrsa doesn’t lift her head, but the moment my focus settles back on her, she feels it. A shiver runs through her, and her chin dips even further toward her chest. “I can’t begin to understand thecrippling griefof having your child disappear, and if it were within my power to bring your daughter home, I would do it ina heartbeat. But your fear and your pain—however justified—do not give you the right to demand anything of me, Yrsa Eklund. Continue to do so, and I will show you which of us is the fool. That goes for everyone in this room. Do I make myself clear?”

Aside from Cathal and his daughter, everyone in the conference room echoes various versions of“Yes, Alpha”, their heads still dipped in deference.

I nod, my wolf satisfied with the level of submission he’s been shown. “Everyone get out,” I snap, not bothering to contain my alpha bark. I need to think, and I can’t do that with these people breathing down my fucking neck. As if they’d all been poked in the ass with a cattle rod, everyone jumps in place and files toward the door. Everyone aside from Canaan and the McNamaras. I arch a challenging brow at the other pack Alpha. “I will find you soon to discuss where we go from here.”

The asshole still doesn’t make a move to leave.

“Like I said, Rennick, I’d figure it out quickly if I were you. I can have my men pulled from their posts within an hour if our deal goes to shit over this…girl.” Cathal spits the word out with a vitrail I don’t think Noa’s earned. Mate or not, she’s innocent in all of this. My wolf’s ears flatten, a warning growl rumbling my chest. The Alpha, while still scowling, is wise enough to take a step back toward the open door. “For your pack’s sake, I hope you make the right choice. And when you do, I expect a public apology for the embarrassment you’ve caused my daughter with this whole dog and pony show.”

Talis looks at me, her dark, fox-like eyes shimmering, on the verge of spilling tears. But I’m not conceited enough to think the threat of waterworks has anything to do with the possibility of our so-called love being in jeopardy. No, our union was never built on genuine emotional connection. Some days, I think it barely qualifies as toleration. At least on my end. The moisturein Talis’s gaze isn’t for me. It’s for thetitleshe stands to lose. Being my future Luna, that’s what she truly loves.

As a beta, that title is something rarely—if ever—donned by someone of her designation. Pack Alpha is almost always a role passed down through generations, specifically, to the next alpha in line. Gender doesn’t matter, designation does. While alphas often take betas as chosen mates, their union will never produce an alpha heir. Only an omega can do that. That’s why the title of Luna is almost always reserved for an omega. A pack Alpha choosing a beta as their mate all but guarantees that their family’s reign ends with them. A pack needs an alpha at its head. The dominance required to lead a pack isn’t something a beta or omega possesses.

I knew this when I signed the metaphorical dotted line, agreeing to Cathal’s caveat for our deal. At the time, sacrificing the future of my own bloodline felt like a fair trade if it meant I could better protect the pack’s omegas. I made peace with this months ago, or at least I thought I had. But now, like everything else since I laid eyes on her, I’m questioning it all over again.

I don’t speak another world to either of them as they turn and follow the path the council took out of the room. And hopefully out of my goddamn house.

It’s not until the door closes behind them that I let the emotions that have been warring beneath my skin to wash over me. Like being slammed by a tidal wave of confusion, doubt, and an aching need for something I can’t even name, I stumble back against the wall. Bent forward, elbows on my thighs, I let my head hang between my shoulders and justbreathe.

Canaan shifts to stand beside me, his large hand patting my shoulder. After a moment, he just lets his palm rest there, showing his silent support. As wolves, we’re tactile creatures and find immense comfort in physical touch, especially if it comes from a pack member. And even more so, from a mate.

“Talk to me, brother,” he urges. “What’s going on in that head of yours? How do you not know if she’s yours or not?”

I momentarily let myself to get sucked back into the memory of that moment when Noa’s sweet-as-sin voice whispered that one little word.Mate. It’d been so soft, almost fragile sounding, and yet the havoc its wreaked is anything but.

“My wolf is adamant she is,” I admit, exhaling deeply as if that will help expel some of this hectic energy racking me. Unsurprisingly, it does fuck all. “He caught her scent and he just…lost it. Completely infatuated with her on the spot.”

“And you? How do you feel about her?”

“I just keep thinking that it doesn’t make sense.” I shove myself up, forcing my body to stop using the wall for support. Walking forward a few paces, my fingers shove through my hair, tugging at the strands. “We were basically raised together. Her mom was the pack healer before she…” I trail off, knowing I still need to find a way to address that shitshow with Noa. “Thalassa was a pillar of our pack, and she worked closely with my dad, because of that, Noa was always here. I can’t for the life of me figure out why I haven’t thought about her in all these years, but we were around each other all the time growing up.”

Memories of running around this very house while our parents worked late or summer days down by the lake surface from the depths of my subconscious.Hell, I think I may have been the one to teach her to swim, now that I think about it.