Page 35 of Primal

Noa’s throat moves as she swallows thickly. “What about our…” She trails off, her words sticking.

“Ourwhat?”

She shifts uneasily in her leather boots, footwear that is highly inappropriate for the dead but overgrown clearing we stand in. “You’re really going to stand here and tell me you don’t feel it?”

I stare down my nose at her, that fissure in my chest cracking more. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“There’s a connection between us. Apull. I know you feel it, Rennick.” A twinge of distress infects her words, her elegant brows drawing together beneath her artfully styled bangs.

My arms cross in front of me. From the outside looking in, I’m sure it reads how I intend it to. As a continued show of frigid indifference and detachment, but in reality, I’m doing my best to keep my hands from reaching out to her, from taking hold of her and bringing her into my embrace. Where she belongs.

“I’m sorry to disappoint you. The only thing I feel toward you is annoyance and mild frustration that I’ve been forced to participate in this dog and pony show.” The words are ash on my tongue. “As I told you, I am happy with my chosen mate. Yoursurprise visit to my territory has been nothing but a nuisance for us both. I would appreciate it if you’d allow us to just get this over with.”

This time, Noa stumbles back a half step, the physical signs of her heart breaking evident in the way her face contorts and pales to a shade I can only describe as ghostly. “I don’t…I don’t understand.”

I’m so consumed by the way my own words are also ripping me apart—lost in the battle between my emotions and my wolf’s fury—that I don’t hear the confident footsteps until it’s too late. A manicured hand, nails painted an ungodly shade of coral, slides over my forearm with a familiarity Talis has never been permitted.

“You silly, wolfless girl. You’re embarrassing yourself.” Talis speaks as if she’s talking to a petulant child, and not a twenty-five-year-old woman worthy of being shown a scrap of respect. I know it’s hypocritical given I’ve been using my own words to slice down Noa’s resolve, but sitting back and allowing someone else to hurt her in any way is more than my wolf can bear. More than I can bear. “I'm sure we can thank your mother for that inflated ego. She probably filled your head with the idea that you mattered, that the world somehow revolved around you. But let me set the record straight. You’re nothing, Noa Alderwood. A packless, wolfless nobody. You don’t have to understand what’s happening here. You just have to sit there and take it like the pathetic little mutt you are.”

Too far. Too Far. Too far.

But the devastating truth is, the way Noa is slowly caving into herself, it’s just far enough. If I want to become her monster, this is how I accomplish it.

“She’s right,” I bite out. Canaan’s earlier words about surviving this creep back into my mind, but in this moment, I’m not sure I want to survive it. The unshed tears pooling in hereyes—eyes too beautiful for this world, too achingly poignant—might as well be the ink I use to sign my own death sentence. And since I’m dead anyway, I go in for the kill shot, knowing I’m going to regret these words for the rest of my life. “Even if I did feel this pull or whatever you’re calling it…”Pullis not a strong enough world. This thing between us, it’s something that is as vital as the air in our lungs and something as strong as gravity. “Why would I willingly take you as my mate, as my Luna, when you’relatent?”Lies.But effective lies. “My pack would never accept you standing at my side. Especially when it was your own traitorous mother who bound your wolf and made youdefective.”

Despite the way my cruelty has her swaying on her feet, Noa’s denial, while weak, is immediate. “That’s not true. You…you’relying.”

Fuck, how I wish it wasn’t true. It’s like swallowing razor blades to use this ugly truth against her now. To use it to my advantage. I’d promised myself I would find a gentle way to tell Noa the truth about her mother’s actions days ago, but what’s one more broken promise at this point?

Talis opens her mouth, no doubt ready to throw another fatal verbal dagger, but I stop her before she can utter a syllable.

“Wait in the car while I finish this.”

“But,” she tries to argue, the glee in her eyes giving away her desire to remain in her front-row seat to Noa’s heartbreak. Her devastation.

“Now.” I use my alpha bark, my unchecked dominance laced within the single word. Talis has no choice but to obey me.

I don’t miss the way Noa flinches, curling in on herself like she’s trying to disappear. Behind her, the Craddock Alpha, the coven High Priestess, and the blonde elfin omega all look like they’re already planning my slow, painful demise. And honestly, with the guilt tearing through me, I wouldn’t stopthem. Whatever creative demise they think I deserve, I’ll take it.Willingly. Gladly.

The silver lining in this is knowing that, despite the fact she doesn’t have an official pack, Noa still has a support system behind her. A bloodthirsty support system by the looks of it.

Noa, still trying to hang on to any strength she has left, lifts her chin and boldly meets my cold stare. The tears running freely down her face gut me. “Okay, Alpha Fallamhain, you’ve made your point.” Her voice, which was so sweet the first time I heard her speak, is a dull, lifeless rasp.

You’ve ruined her.

My wolf’s fury burns hotter, his devastation just as consuming as my own.We did this.To her. To us. And he knows it. We are hurtling toward a point of no return, and when we reach it, I don’t know what he’ll do. His distrust in me is thick,palpable, and stomach-turning,twisting in my gut like a sickness I can’t shake.

But even that is nothing compared to the sorrow rolling off Noa in waves, heavy enough to drown us both.

It’s a battle to keep my touch harsh, detached, when I reach out for her slender arm. Her faint whine of pain as I yank the limb outward cuts me to my soul. Wrapping my large palm around her forearm, I force her smaller hand to do the same to mine. It’s a joke. Not in this lifetime or the next will her fingers ever be able to properly wrap around my forearm.

Beneath my touch, her pulse races, each frantic beat echoing through my fingertips. With every thundering pound of her heart, mine matches it, perfectly in sync. Further proof they were never meant to beat apart.

Ice and dread creep up my throat as I stare down at the small, broken female who was meant to be mine to love. To cherish. To protect. Instead, I’m failing her in every way that matters and then some.

In my grasp, I lock on to her two-toned gaze and for the briefest of seconds, I let my ice melt away and I silently plead that she will one day find a way to forgive me. That she will understand the decision I’ve made.

Forgive me, sweet Noa. Please. Forgive me.

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