Page 55 of Primal

Images of her rough shape when she’d first arrived here replay in my mind and my heart breaks all over again as they do. But now, knowing what she endured to make it here, that heartbreak is tangled with awe. She clawed her way through hell to reach us. Survived things no one should have to. I don’t think she realizes how resilient she is yet, how brave. But we’ll remind her. Every damn day if we have to.

Head lifting, she slowly looks at each of us in the room, and then, with a tremble in her lip and tears shining in her already glassy eyes, she whispers, “I don’t know how, but I know inmy heart that Carly didn’t make it. I know she’s dead. My wolf knows it too.”

Her admission sits heavy in the air.

It’s the way Canaan shifts where he stands, deliberately placing his now empty coffee mug on the counter, like he’s stalling for a few extra seconds to gather himself, that tells me whatever he’s about to say is going to destroy her.

Across the table, Rhosyn shifts her weight, eyes fixed on her folded hands as her throat works around a thick swallow.

“Siggy, there’s something we need to tell you,” he starts, “it’s about Carly.”

Chapter 22

Noa

Our Nightingale needed time alone in her nest after learning about her best friend. Not that any of us could blame her. If I’d found out Seren had been discarded, left bloodied and broken, I don’t think I’d be able to get out of bed for a month. Minimum.

Edie had come over to take Ivey as well, leaving Seren and I alone with the Fallamhain Pack’s mated pair. A heavy silence we all knew wouldn’t last long fell over us as everyone worked to clean up after breakfast.I’d tried to get up and help, but one sharp look from Seren had me plunking my tired, aching ass right back down. No words, just that stare that told me if I even thought about moving, she’d tackle me. It made me inwardly wince for teenage Ivey.

At some point, Canaan quietly placed a protein shake in front of me. We don’t keep them in the fridge, so I knew right away he’d bought it specifically for me. It was a gesture that made something deep in me soften, a flicker of warmth in the cold ache that hadn’t let up since the clearing. Some quiet, instinctive part of me stirred, tickled pink by the idea of being cared for by an alpha.Even if he isn’tmyalpha.

He even poured it over ice and stuck a pink bendy straw in it, like that would magically make the chalky sludge more appealing. It was sweet. Almost endearing. But one sip told me it was a lost cause. The second the thick, chocolate-flavored liquid hit my tongue, my throat closed up like it was protesting the entire idea.

Nice try, though, buddy.

Now, his hazel eyes are equal parts sad and concerned when he catches me nudging the full glass of protein shake farther away from me on the antique kitchen table.

“This won’t be sustainable much longer, Noa,” Canaan says quietly, finishing the last of the breakfast cleanup. In a way that feels painfully domestic, he tosses a striped dish towel over his broad shoulder and comes to sit across from me.

“I know,” I admit, my voice small. The truth tastes worse than the shake.

Rhosyn brushes past him, giving his arm a gentle nudge as she drops into the chair beside him. “Give her a break,” she says. “It’s only been a couple days. She needs time to adjust from the…from what Rennick did.”

The way she not-so-gracefully stumbles over the word“rejection”isn’t something that goes unmissed. By me, or Seren, from across the room, another damn cup of tea in her hand, no doubt intended for me. My best friend rolls her eyes.

“There’s no reason to pussyfoot around it,” Seren says as she strides over and places the tea beside the untouched shake. My nose crinkles as the peppermint and lemon scent hits me.Emotional distress reliever, my ass. I might have to do some rebranding.“Rennick rejected her. It was cruel. A top-tier dick move. But it’s done. Now we need to focus on making sure Noa heals from the fallout. And she will. She’s going to get through this.”

Goddess, how I want to believe her. I want to wrap myself in Seren’s unwavering belief, let it stitch me back together from the inside out. Borrow her strength until I remember what it feels like to have my own.Because today, I’ve been faking it. Hiding the winces. Swallowing the whimpers clawing at my throat. I’ve been sitting here pretending I’m surviving, putting on a brave face, all the while I can feel it growing. The rot stems from the vacancy he tore into my chest. The bond he severed left an invisible wound, wide open and festering. And the infection is spreading. I can feel it—this slow, merciless deterioration—and I still have no idea how to stop it.

What could possibly cure something like this? I’ve spent years learning the art of healing, but how do you treat an injury you can’t see? There isn’t a salve or antibiotic that can treat a wound that is soul-deep.

And that terrifying realization leaves me staring across the table at my best friend, wondering how the hell she’s still standing. How she made it through her own rejection over a year ago. How she smiles. How she thrives.

Was her rejection that different from mine?

“Speaking of Rennick.” I can’t help but flinch at the way she so easily throws his name around. I can’t recall if I’ve had the strength to say his name aloud since I woke up from my…episode. “We never finished our conversation of why he rejected her. We were in the middle of it last night when Siggy walked in and we took that much-needed but depressing little detour.”

Canaan’s words from last night resurface, their weight settling heavier now that the truth about Siggy—and poor Carly—has been laid bare.

“He thinks he’s doing right by his pack.”

The same bitterness and disappointment I saw on both of their faces when we last spoke about their Alpha’s betrothal returns. Rhosyn’s usually bouncy curls seem to deflate wheneverTalis McNamara is mentioned, as if even her hair can’t pretend through the bullshit.

“Yeah…” she says with a heavy sigh as she props her head up with her fist on the table. “The man’s heart is in the right place, but he’s too blinded by duty or guilt or…whatever the hell else is clouding his judgment to see what an idiot he’s being.”

My mind is still fighting with one hand tied behind its proverbial back, but the pieces begin to fall into place anyway, one miserable domino at a time. The way he looked at me with poorly concealed remorse and nausea-inducing guilt while simultaneously his unspoken, mental plea—Forgive me, sweet Noa. Please. Forgive me—plagued me is something I’ll ever forget, but I think I now understand why.

“It’s the omegas,” I murmur, my voice steadier than it’s been since I woke up soaked in sweat and pain. “More than just Siggy and Carly have gone missing, haven’t they?”