Page 35 of Shattered Choices

I deserve everything and more.

But I also deserve a second chance, my love.

Yes, you are my love.

My heart.

Something I never thought I’d need, and I will beg for forgiveness as long as I’m alive.

Love, Salvatore

I blink, and a tear falls down my cheek. For all the time we spent together, he never said the word or anything close to it.

He says he’s paid for what he’s done to me, but what does that mean? My eyebrows furrow as I remember wondering how he got here.

I look around the room for any evidence of him being here, but there is none. The windows are closed, and so is my door.

I think about the fact that he disappeared a couple of nights ago after he showed up here, drunk. I couldn’t watch Pino dragging him away and kicking him. I let that happen because I wanted him gone. Gone from this place, this country.

Gone from my mind.

Gone from my heart.

But when I asked about him the next morning, the answer I got was not one I anticipated.

Salvatore was gone, like the Earth opened up and swallowed him alive. Obviously, that didn’t happen since, according to the note and the rose, he was here in my room.

Did he stay? Did he watch me sleep?

I shrug at the feeling of satisfaction and get out of bed. I open the drawer of my nightstand and take out a wooden box decorated with red roses. One that belong to my mother. The box I hide for special things.

I open the box and place the note on top of my wedding ring. I kept it there not for its value, because it is a plain platinum ring, but for the sentiment. A reminder of what I had and lost.

I close the box and place it back in the drawer, then I take the rose and cut it short so it can fit in my journal. I open it and place it inside, leaving it on the nightstand before I make my way into the bathroom and get ready for the day.

I arrive at the docks with Pino to meet with Mauro and the crew responsible for shipments. After the other night, we need to regroup and plan other routes. There are two hundred kilos of white powder scheduled to be docked in a few days. We’ve delayed that for now by letting the captain drift the ship into the water slowly, but unfortunately, there is only a limited amount of time he is allowed to do that. We don’t need the coastguard on our back as well.

I tighten my coat to shield myself from the wind from the ocean, Pino and I walk side by side toward the men gathered at the side of the containers.

When we arrive, their chatter stops, and all eyes turn toward us. I can feel the tension in the air. They don’t have to say a thing. I know their concerns. They’ve probably already heard what happened to Giovanni, and what he did.

“If you have something to say, say it now. Later, it will be too late.” I look each one of them in the eye as I speak.

They don’t speak, but I see how they look at each other and, with Mauro here, I can only assume he knows their concerns.

Mauro clears his throat, bringing my attention to him and proving to me that I was right. “We have some issues. The Carabinieri haven’t left this area. They keep circling around and showing up with every ship that docks here.”

I nod in understanding. “I know. I saw them on my way here. The ship with our goods can’t keep drifting slowly in the waters forever, though.”

“So, what’s the plan? Do we have one?” Mauro's puzzled look is directed only at me.

“Yes. Tonight, at ten p.m., you will take four of them.” I look at the dozen men in front of me. “I will not tell you who you should take. That’s on you. But they need to be strong and good swimmers. I have made an agreement with one of the fishermen, Roberto. In exchange for something only I know about, he will take you to the coordinates I give you. He will take you instead of his crew. You will sail with him into the waters until you reach the ship with the goods. The captain has already been informed, and you don’t need to worry about him. He is my concern.” I take a deep breath, studying the faces before me, looking for just a moment of uneasiness from any one of them, but I don’t see it, so I continue. “The fisherman will drift his boat beside the ship, and you will have exactly two hours to transfer the goods into the Roberto’s boat. We have been lucky he didn’t sell any fish this morning. He will provide enough Styrofoam fish boxes and ice for the goods before it’s covered with fish.” Some of the men nod in understanding. “Any questions thus far?”

“What about fisherman Roberto? Is he trustworthy? How can you be sure he won’t say anything?” one of the men asks. He is a little older than the rest of the crew, and I recognize him by the scar on his face from one of the gatherings my father held.

I bite the inside of my cheek. Why Roberto is willing to do this is something only Pino and I know. “I can assure you he will not speak. His fishing crew is resting, a decision made as a result ofnot selling the fish. There will be a refrigerated truck waiting for you at the fishing docks. You will transfer the goods with the fish there and the driver will bring the goods to the usual place.”

“What if someone catches us, like a coastguard or the Carabinieri?” someone asks.

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