Page 19 of Do You Ship It

‘You didn’t tell me this was aromance! Jake!’ I cast about for something to throw at him, but his pillows are too far out of reach, so I settle for taking a playful swipe at his shin instead while he laughs, his eyes glittering at my reaction. ‘I would’ve watched this with you ages ago if you’d told me that! I thought it was all boring sword fights and casting spells and stuff.’

‘The sword fights are theoppositeof boring,’ he tells me. ‘Have you even been paying attention toanyof the scenes with Daxys? He’s just … He’samazing.’

Max says, ‘And the spells are pretty cool, too.’ Then he laughs, and gestures at me as he says to Jake, ‘I told you she’d be a Silversmith shipper in no time. Called it.’

‘A what?’

‘Lady Adanna di Silver, and Devon Smith, her … I guess you’d call him her bodyguard? A soldier sworn to protect her. They’re a really popular ship in the fandom,’ Max explains. ‘People rooting for them to be together, you know, romantically.’

I feel my cheeks warm. ‘Iknowwhat shipping is.’

He doesn’t acknowledge me, but carries on, ‘Especially because of the forbidden element – Devon tries to be really proper and not overstep when his duty is to watch her back, not, you know, fall for her. Although even half the Silversmith fans are convinced they’re not endgame, and he’ll die.’

‘He’llwhat? But –’

But that’s not how it works! Don’t they know? Haven’t they ever seen a romance movie? The way they looked at each other …

‘There’s tons of theories about how he’ll die protecting her,’ Jake tells me. ‘Especially with the foreshadowing in this episode. “Until the end.” People think he’ll go down defending her.’

‘Oh!’ I clasp a hand to my chest, already picturing it. ‘That’s so tragic and romantic.’

Is it weird if I ask Jake to rewind it so we can watch that scene again? It was justso good. How can Jake have neglected to mentionthisany time he’s waxed lyrical about his favourite series?

How is trekking through the forest and ragtag bands of rebels more worthwhile than an epic, maybe doomed, romance?

‘Okay, spoilersplease,’ I say, feeling the need to disclose after the constant jokes about it on Discord. I grab Jake’s shin, leaning towards him with wide eyes. ‘Tell me they havetonsmore screentime together.’

‘Somuch screentime,’ he promises. ‘Four seasons’ worth, so far.’

‘Amazing. Perfect. Yes.’

He laughs, and I can’t even be embarrassed about my unashamed fangirling. Even in the fantasy setting, the romance storyline works. Maybe it even makes itbetter?

‘She’ll be going home to find the fanfics, now,’ Max tells Jake – and why, why does he keep talking about me like I’m not here? Am I invisible? Am I worth so little of his energy that he can barely even acknowledge me, and will only talk to Jake?

But my curiosity gets the better of me, and my face falls a bit. ‘Fanfiction? What, like … like people writing stories about all of BTS falling in love with them on tour, or something?’

‘Kind of,’ Jake says, and then scoots down the bed to grasp my shoulders and stare into my eyes. It’s not as intense as Devon and Lady di Silver, but I stare back, willing it to be. We’re sat on Jake’s bed, my knees touching his thigh, his face only inches from mine … discussing OWAR fanfiction while his new bestieMaxloiters nearby. This isn’t how I pictured it.

But Jake’s still talking, and I try hard to pay attention.

‘Cerys, when I tell you this is a very dedicated fanbase, I mean it. Word has it there is a fic from a couple of years ago that’seight hundred thousand words, and two girls wrote it together in less than a year.’

‘That’s … a lot,’ I say carefully. I know Jake will think I mean the word count, but in reality, I’m thinking that’s a lot of time and effort to put into something that … doesn’t really matter.

Didn’t those girls have anything better to do? Didn’t they want to do something more productive, or fun? How did they write almost a million words of a story that hardly anybody will read anyway, in less than a year? They can’t have done anything else in that time. Isn’t that a bit sad, a bit weird? Isn’t it … well, alot?

I can’t imagine pouring that sort of time and effort into an art project. I think of the abandoned pieces stacked under my bed, unfinished and cast aside whenever my inspiration waned or life got in the way.

Did they really decide to put their whole heart and soul into creating something just …because?

It’s so bizarre I can’t even wrap my head around it, but there’s a burning sensation deep in my chest that feels a bit like … jealousy.

I can feel Max looking at me,judging me, and wonder if he can hear the things I’m not saying out loud the way Jake sometimes does. Am I really so easy to read?

He says, in another cryptic ‘is it a quote from the show or just Max being a dork’ phrase, ‘A daunting prospect indeed. The time to bow out is not yet past.’

I ignore him, and say to Jake, ‘Let’s watch the next one.’

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