Page 12 of You Had Me at Hockey

“Some of the best things you can achieve come from fighting through challenges.”

His voice has changed, deepened, and I feel the emotion loaded in it, although he still seems calm.

“Pressure is a privilege. I want that pressure and I think I’ve learned how to use it to my advantage.” Then he scrubs a hand over his face and mutters what could be a curse word under his breath.

I’m so curious. I want to ask more and yet I sense his reluctance to say more. Do I risk offending him or try to get deeper? “And how do you use it your advantage?”

“Well, I try to embrace pressure situations by seeing them as a challenge to reach my full potential. I even try to pressure myself during practices.”

I’d like to stop and think more about what he’s saying because I feel like it could help me in my own life, but we have to keep talking because nobody wants to listen to empty air on a podcast.

“What about the fans?” I ask, since this is something I also have to deal with. “Do they put a lot of pressure on you?”

“Sure. But that’s their right. They pay money to watch games and they’re entitled to see us perform at our best.”

“Nobody can perform at their best every single day, though.”

“True. But I think fans forgive an off day or night if you genuinely work hard.”

I nod. “I wonder if there’s a difference between fans in Dallas and here in New York.”

“I wonder too.” His slight smile is wry. “I guess I’ll find out.”

“Does it bother you when fans say mean things about you?”

He purses his lips. “I’d be lying if I said no, but I honestly try not to pay attention to that stuff.”

“Right? But it’s hard not to when your career puts you out there in front of the whole world.” As I’ve been learning the last few years.

“The important thing is to do what’s best for you and not to worry about pleasing everyone else. Because you can’t. And just stay consistent with your own values and beliefs.”

“Your values obviously include working hard.”

“Yeah. Learning from mistakes. And staying humble. Hockey is a sport that really focuses on teamwork. As kids, we’re taught to be humble and private. It’s a part of hockey culture.”

He definitely doesn’t fit the stereotype of an arrogant, entitled pro athlete. I’m finding myself mesmerized by him. I’m sensing there’s so much beneath the surface of what he’s saying. I’m dying to know more.

We keep chatting. My podcasts are usually forty to forty-five minutes long and it’s so easy to fill the time talking to Josh. When Oliver gives me a signal to start wrapping things up, I’m amazed how much time has passed. And kind of bummed.

“Let’s finish off with some quick questions. Do you have any tattoos?”

“Yeah. I have tattoos on the inside of each wrist.” He lifts his hands. “And a bigger one on my shoulder.”

“Would you rather have to fart every time you have a serious conversation or have to burp after every kiss?”

He chokes on a laugh. “What? Uh…”

I grin, waiting.

“I guess fart every time I have a serious conversation. Burping in someone’s face is a turnoff.”

Still smiling, I say, “Would you rather eat a sandwich made from three ingredients in your fridge chosen at random, or eat a sandwich made by a group of your friends from three ingredients in your fridge?”

He considers this, fingertips rubbing his chin. “Ingredients chosen at random. God knows what my friends would put into the sandwich.”

“Excellent! Well, I’m going to wrap things up,” I say. “I hope you all enjoyed my conversation with Josh Heller. You can find him on Instagram @JHeller25—is the twenty-five for your age?” I know that’s how old he is.

He shakes his head. “That’s my jersey number.”

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