Page 95 of Body Shot

“I think about it all the time.”

Marco chokes on a laugh.

“Because you wish yours was as big as mine.” I smile knowingly.

“Enough talking about your dicks,” Marco says. “Back to Hayden.”

“Hayden likes my dick, too.”

“Jesus. I thought you said ‘Hayden licks my dick.’ ”

I grin. “Yeah, I’m not gonna share intimate details with you assholes.”

“Look.” Cade’s face sobers. “You’ve been different lately. You’ve been around a lot more.” He pauses.

Marco interjects. “Reliable.”

I frown. “What the fuck does that mean? I’m reliable.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Cade waves a hand. “Most of the time.” He winces. “There have been a few times we needed you here and you were out . . . playing.”

I stare at him, then Marco. “Fuck.”

They hold my gaze steadily.

“Fuck,” I say again. “Really?”

They give brief nods.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I rub my forehead. “Shit.”

“Fun’s important to you,” Cade says. “And . . . well, you’re the one with the money.”

“Jesus Christ.” My jaw slackens and I sink back down into the chair. “Don’t ever fucking say that. Don’t ever fucking treat me differently because of that. I can’t fucking believe this.”

Their faces tighten.

Thoughts run wildly through my head, and I’m pissed. And confused. And . . . hurt.

Have I fucked up? Have I let them down? My two brothers I’d do anything for?

“We’re fine,” Marco says in a low voice. “Right?”

I shake my head and lift my chin. “No. All in. All the time.” I focus intently on them. “I let you guys down. I’m sorry.”

“Nah, man, it’s fine.” Cade shakes his head.

“You said it. It’s not fine.” I scrub a hand over my beard. “The money doesn’t give me the right to slack off. I know that. I don’t want that. I don’t want you to think that.”

“We don’t,” Marco says, voice low. “Seriously.”

“Okay. Good.” I let out a sharp exhalation. “And I’ve been having fun, yeah, enjoying freedom and being my own boss . . . our own bosses . . . but this is important to me, too. You gotta know that.”

“We do,” they both say.

I stare at the floor for a moment, shame burning in my gut. I’m a goddamn idiot.

“I said you’ve been different lately because I think it’s Hayden,” Cade says. “You seem a lot steadier. Settled.”

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