Page 19 of In It to Win It

“Yeah, I really like it. Lacey’s obsessed with the ocean, so if we ever move, it’s going to have to be beachfront.”

I laugh.

“What’s funny about that?”

“You. You’re funny. You’re completely whi?—”

“Don’t say it.” He holds up a hand and gives me a stern look. “That’s offensive to Lacey.”

I snap my mouth shut. “You’re right,” I admit. “I didn’t mean it that way. I love Lacey.” His frown deepens. “I mean, notlovelove. I like her a lot. Like . . . like a sister.”

Things are still a little sensitive between us because of what happened with Emma.

He grins. “I know, I know.” He lifts the lid of the barbecue, which has apparently been heating, and carefully lays the steaks on the grill.

“I actually like it that you’re so in love with her you’ll do whatever she wants,” I continue, a little sheepish about trying to make a joke about it.

“She’ll do anything to make me happy too,” he says quietly, lowering the barbecue lid.

It’s hard not to make a sarcastic “aw” comment. Clearly, I still have a bit of a chip on my shoulder when it comes to my big brother.

Okay, I’m a little jealous.

It’s crazy, because Théo hasn’t had an easy life. He got picked on for being a nerd when he was a kid. He worked his ass off at hockey because he thought that would shut people up. And it did. Then he took that puck in the face and lost a lot of his sight in one eye. He never played pro hockey again, after he’d worked so hard for it.

Luckily, he had his stats business that he built up into a mega success, and now he’s managing an NHL team at only twenty-eight years old. If something happened to me and I got hurt, I’d end up living on the street, panhandling for change.

The idea scares the shit out of me, so I don’t think about it. Even though I know I should have some kind of plan for my future. I’m only twenty-six. I have lots of years ahead of me. Ishouldhave, anyway. I still don’t feel like I’ve “made it,” like I’ve accomplished everything I want to do. But sometimes we don’t get the choice.

“I’m glad shit’s going right for you,” I finally say. “You’ve been through a lot. I really admire how you’ve handled your life.”

Théo nods. “Thanks.”

“And I know I didn’t help.”

“I pretty much wanted to kill you.” He takes a seat on one of the comfy chairs with a wry smile.

My guts twist. “I deserved it.”

“It wasn’t your fault that you had everything I ever wanted.”

I stare at him. “I did?”

“Sure. You have the hockey career I worked my ass off for.”

Ah, hell. My stomach plummets. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize. It’s not your fault I got hurt.” He pauses. “It was just . . . hard. And then you took my girl . . .”

“Shit.” I rub my face. “That I’ve apologized for.”

“I know. You said it was a mistake.”

“I seem to make a lot of them.” I’m thinking of Taylor now. Maybe itwasa mistake, but damn, she was worth it, until I found out what was going on. “Like I want to have another beer right now.”

Théo gives me a look.

“But I’m not going to. Not to brag, but I don’t even need alcohol to make bad decisions.”

---