Page 25 of GDL

It's so moving that Sawyer wants his kids to see their dad return to his peak, and it totally sucks that we live in a world where people get shoved aside just because they're in their forties. Why does everyone make such a big deal about age?

I was shocked when Sawyer told me about the ageism he'd experienced in the industry. I knew women experienced it—which is wrong and needs to change—but I had no idea it affected men, too. I assumed him stepping out of the spotlight was his choice, not something imposed on him because job offers started drying up. I really hope his comeback is a huge success for not only him but all the people out there who have a dream, whatever age they may be. And also because I've seen Sawyer dance, and he would be terrible onDancing with the Stars.

"Uh-oh." Sawyer looks down at Ashton and waves his hand in front of his nose. "Someone needs to have their nappy changed. You happy for me to do it?"

"Always," I reply with a smile.

"Back in five." Sawyer says, scooping Ashton up and taking him into the nursery.

I'm much better with the whole diaper situation, but I'll never pass up an offer for someone to do it for me. I get up and make myself useful by putting on a fresh jug of coffee. As I wait for the water to boil, I think about the termsettling down. It's what my brothers said on our video call last night, ribbing me that Sawyer and I are doing just that, settling down. But why is it called that? Why not settling up? Because if this is what a settled life looks like, then sign me up forever.

I turn around to see Sawyer carrying Ashton into the kitchen, and my heart swoops. I love seeing the man I love with my son. There are literally no words to describe what it does to me.

Speaking of words, despite Sawyer practically moving in and us spending all our free time together and being very domesticated, we still haven't said those three little words to each other.

But I'm as sure of my love for Sawyer as I am of my love for Ashton. Sawyer is the best person I've ever met, and my plan is to tell him I love him tonight, right after the screening.

That night…

Sawyer

"I can't get over how cute he is," Benji says, gushing over Ashton for the millionth time tonight.

"Don't go getting any ideas," Darren says, lifting a finger. "I am not ready to be a father."

I clap him on the shoulder. "I'll let you boys in on a little secret." They come in closer. "You never feel ready. You just have to take the plunge and do it."

"And is that what you're doing?" Finch asks. "Taking the plunge?"

"I sure am."

In more ways than one. I'm huddled away in a quiet corner of The Aero Theatre in Santa Monica with Finch, Benji, Darren, and baby Ash. Tonight's the big night. The first public viewing of the interview before it gets released online at midnight.

We've been teasing it on social media for about a month now, and the interest is huge. Doesn't mean I'm not nervous as hell, though. It feels a little strange to be doing it this way. I'm used to having a network behind me, having them handle the marketing and PR blitz. But I wasn't prepared to cave in to their demands since it meant I wouldn't be able to keep my promise to Kynan, so the indie path it is. It's proven successful for others, so I'm hoping it works for me, too.

"There you guys are," Kynan says, approaching us. "I was starting to get worried someone had kidnapped Ashton."

"Why did you look at me when you said that?" Benji asks in mock surprise.

"Makes the most sense," Kynan and I respond at the same time.

"Ughh, I love you both, but you two are too much." Finch groans with an eye roll and a smile.

The guys proceed to tease me and Kynan the way they always do whenever we get together, but my heart is so happy hearingFinch say he loves both of us. It's wonderful how he and Benji have been so welcoming of Kynan and Ashton.

Kynan and I have faced a number of barriers these past few months. Some I was confident we could overcome easily. Like, say, me moving to the US. I have several homes in Australia, but nothing was tying me there. Relocating to LA was a relatively simple decision.

Others, like me meeting his parents for the first time, or Kynan meeting my boys were downright terrifying because that's when the age gap between us became impossible to ignore. When it's just him and me—or him and me and Ashton as is more often the case—I don't feel the age difference at all. He's smart and mature way beyond his years. But in the presence of his father, who is only two years older than me, or my kids, who are both older than him, it's a glaring truth that can't be avoided. Thankfully, everyone has been great about it and not made a big deal out of it, except for the occasional teasing, which is to be expected.

"Hate to break up this big happy messed-up family." Grayson breaks through the crowd to reach us. "But, mate, we gotta get you out there. Need to schmooze with some bigwigs and all that."

I sigh. "Fine. Can I take Ashton as a buffer?"

Kynan takes him from Benji. "No using my son as a shield. Go. You'll be fine. I'll join you in a moment."

"Fine." I plant a kiss on Ashton's head then one on Kynan's cheek before pressing the flesh with a who's-who of the media elite. Like always, Grayson takes the lead, and like always, I'm grateful for it. When we finally get a break, we head straight for the bar.

"So," he says, once we've placed our drinks order. "Was I right?"

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