Page 6 of Spit Screen

Vicki has spent countless afternoons at the pond with her grandfather. She takes pride in her ability to hook a worm and enjoys seeing me squirm at the sight. Hannah, on the other hand, has no interest in fishing. She prefers searching for frogs and turtles on the shore, gathering flowers, or collecting shiny rocks. And then there’s Noah, only three years old and captivated by every creature he encounters—whether they have fur, feathers, legs, or scales—it doesn’t matter to him. He considers them all his best friends.

My mind wanders to Emma and the simplicity of our life together here. Vicki understands her mother is a celebrity, although she still believes Disney princesses are more famous. She recently asked why Emma wasn't inStar Wars. It was hard for me not to laugh when Vicki declared Emma would be "the most famous" if she played a princess. Vicki has developed a fondness for Princess Leia thanks to Emma's brother Jackson, though she's equally enamored with Han Solo. I told Emma her star would almost certainly rise with Vicki if she carried a blaster on screen or piloted a spaceship. Emma gave her standard response, "Write it, and we'll talk."

Hannah and Noah have led relatively sheltered lives away from the spotlight of Emma's career. People here know their mom as Emmie, not Emma Bronson Blake or an Emmy award-winning actress. If we were to move back to Los Angeles, our kids would inevitably have more exposure to the world of Hollywood and make-believe. A major project like a television show would bring even more attention to Emma, and I know she worries about navigating that with our children. The projects she's taken on in recent years have been fulfilling but also allowed her to remain largely out of the limelight. However, the project I have in mind would put Emma squarely back in the spotlight—if I can get it off the ground. I'm not sure how she'll feel about that possibility.

“Addy?”

I turn to my father-in-law with a smile. “Sorry.”

“No need to apologize. I know worms on hooks aren’t you’re thing,” Tom teases me.

I chuckle.

“Something tells me it’s not the worms on your mind,” he says.

“Not the worms—this is, though.”

“This?”

“Being here,” I say. “Just being here,” I whisper.

Tom nods. “Let’s sit on the rock and watch the kids.”

I follow him a few feet away from the water’s edge and sit beside him on a large rock. Emma calls it the frog rock. It doesn’t look anything like a frog to me. I guess it did to her when she was Hannah’s age.

“You know, everyone will understand if you decide to go back to California,” Tom says.

My surprise must show because he chuckles.

“Come on, Addy. You and Emma didn’t believe you could hide here forever, did you?”

“I don’t think we’rehiding,” I reply.

“What would you call it?”

“Finding normalcy, I guess.”

“Normal is different for everyone,” Tom says.

I chuckle. My father-in-law is a plain-spoken man whose words hold more wisdom than the ones I’ve read in many philosophy books.

“We’ll miss you,” he tells me.

“I don’t know if we are going anywhere, Tom.”

“No? I think we all know it’s inevitable. Emmie thinks she has to choose, Addy. She’s always been that way. It’s why she left here and only came home for the holidays and special occasionsuntil she met you. You reminded her there’s more to life than auditions, magazine covers, and award shows.”

I shake my head. “No. Emma has always understood that.”

Tom tilts his head curiously.

“That’s why she stayed away—if I had to guess. It always makes her feel torn. I don’t think Em is hiding from her career. She misses it. I feel it. I think we all do.” I sigh. “But she isn’t lying when she says the kids mean more to her than her career—this—being with family is the most important thing in her world. I think she worries about what the kids might be exposed to if we move back. And I worry, too.”

“Nothing anyone says about either of you will change how the kids see you.”

“Maybe not now,” I say. “That isn’t what worries me, though.”

“So? What is it?”

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