Page 17 of Before Dawn

Something else just shattered—something deeper, a part of me I didn’t even know was left to break.

I felt useless. I felt disgusted. I felt fucking defeated.

Placing my phone on the table, my fingers trembled as I let it go. I sat there in complete silence. For an hour, maybe more, I just… shut down. I couldn’t move. Couldn’t think. Nothing.

The only thing I was certain of was how disrespected I felt. How utterly hollowed he’d left me. My stomach churned, nausea creeping in, but I swallowed it down. No tears came—maybe I was too broken to cry anymore. Or maybe I just refused to let him have that part of me too.

The hurt was overwhelming, crashing over me in waves. Every second that passed, it sank deeper into my bones. How little he thought of me. How he tore me apart and left me to pick up the shattered pieces, as if they were meaningless.

I forced myself to push it all aside, shoving the knot of frustration down. There’d be time to deal with all of that later—maybe. Right now, Azzaria had texted, asking me to meet her for drinks at Jimmy’s Corner.

I needed the distraction as much as she did.

Whatever was weighing her down seemed heavy. Mine? Well, mine could sit in the dark a little while longer.

When I got there, she was already at the bar, downing shots like water. One after another, no pause, no hesitation.

“Keep them coming,” she told the bartender, her voice laced with anger and something deeper, something sharper.Desperation.

Sliding onto the stool next to her, I studied her face. “I think you should do something else instead of drinking,” I said cautiously, not wanting to come off as preachy but needing to say something.

She shrugged, her shoulders slumping as if the weight of the world had settled there. “Like what? I don’t really have many other interests.”

“What about that gym you used to go to? You were really into it before.”

For a split second, nostalgia flickered across her face, but it faded just as quickly, replaced by regret.

“Yeah, it’s still there, but I’ve got a teensy balance I need to clear off. Plus, you know I’m cutting expenses.”

Her words settled uncomfortably in my chest.

I reached out, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze. “You should go back, even if it’s just for a little while. I can help you out if you need it.”

Her eyes darted toward me, wary. I added quickly, “Or maybe you could switch to a college plan? Most gyms have special rates for students.”

“Maybe.” Her tone was reluctant, her eyes still clouded with uncertainty.

“Good!” I grinned, trying to lift the mood, even if just a little. “It’ll help you burn off all this pent-up anger and frustration. And trust me, you’ve got plenty of both right now.”

That earned me a sigh and a faint, grudging smile. “Yeah, I guess it couldn’t hurt to go back.”

And then, she shrugged and downed another shot.

I gave her a moment before pressing. “What the hell happened today?”

She hesitated, but then the words spilled out anyway, raw and bitter.

“I apologized to him out of courtesy for Friday night.You know what he told me?That it was a mistake on both our parts and we should keep things professional.”

She let out a bitter laugh, but her fingers clenched around her glass, knuckles turning white. For a second, I swore I saw something in her eyes—hurt, regret—but then she blinked it away, masking it with indifference.

“I don’t even know why the fuck it bothers me.”

Her words hit me like a sucker punch.

I froze, my grip tightening around the water bottle I didn’t even remember picking up.When did I even get this bottle?

“You’re lying,” I blurted, disbelief ringing in my voice.

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