Page 56 of I Can't Even

The sound of a motorcycle roared by, still, I maintained my calm. I was standing just off the path so as not to be in the way of any other joggers. The motorcycle’s engine revved again. I huffed a breath and concentrated on my breathing. In with the good air and out with the bad, yada, yada, yada. The engine growled one more time and this time, I lost my patience.

I whipped my head around prepared to give the motorcyclist a blast of stink eye that would overheat his engine, but when my gaze met the motorcyclist’s, it was my engine that boiled over. Liam, in a leather jacket astride a big behemoth of a ride, was staring at me as if he couldn’t decide whether to push me off the cliff or kidnap me.

Liam switched off the engine and rolled the bike onto its stand—he swung his leg over the seat and strode toward me. His intense brown gaze made me want to run. I just couldn’t decide if it should be to him or away. So, like a moron I stood frozen, watching him approach with a titillated horrified fascination that I was certain made me look as if I had the shallowest brain pan in existence.

I expected him to stop a few feet away or at the very least on the edge of my personal space. He didn’t. He cruised right up until he was flush against me with one hand clutching my hip while the other gripped the back of my head. His lips landed on mine with the same force of a rolling wave crashing on the beach. His mouth fit perfectly against mine and he made love to my lips just like he had to my body the other night. Oh, wow.

Every bit of me wanted to wrap myself around him and return his kiss measure for measure, but I stood frozen, uncertain what to do. I had promised myself I would step back and figure it out but the only thing I had figured out was that despite my best intentions, I had spent all day missing him, thinking about him, and wanting him. Was it because he was the love of my life or because I was channeling my grief into the beautiful chemistry between us that simply would not fade?

As quickly as Liam grabbed me, he released me except that he kept his hand on my hip, as if to reassure himself that he could stop me if I ran.

I wasn’t running anywhere. Instead, in a perfect moment of clarity, I realized that my feelings for Liam had nothing to do with Babs passing or the revelation that she wasn’t my mother. I didn’t want him more because I was trying to escape my grief but rather, I wanted him because now that Babs was gone so was one of the biggest obstacles to our being together. Maybe when Babs had said she’d wished she had more time to make it right, she had meant this, Liam and me together, finally.

His gaze moved over my face as if he was trying to figure out what I was thinking. I couldn’t find the words, so instead I rose on my toes, looped my arms around his neck, and pulled him in for another kiss. I wasn’t tentative or gentle, rather it was my turn to claim and possess and to let him know quite plainly that I considered him mine.

He pulled me in tight and kissed me back, making it clear that he felt the same way. He tipped my head and kissed my jaw just below my ear, working his way down my neck as I clung to him.

“Surfer girl, you are driving me crazy,” he said. “I can’t fight this anymore. Come home with me.”

“Okay,” I said.

Chapter Eighteen

Liam blinked at me. I don’t think he expected my acquiescence to be so swift. Maybe after all of my embarrassing stunts, I should have played hard to get and made him work for it, because truly, he had been a real prick the other night. But I was running on empty, and I wanted to be with him, naked with him, as swiftly as possible. And not for nothing, but the run back home was mostly uphill and riding with my arms and legs wrapped around the back of him sure seemed like the better option to me.

He grabbed my hand and yanked me across the park almost as fast as I’d been when I was running. When we arrived at the bike, he took off his leather jacket and held it out to me. I was just reaching for it when my phone rang. I glanced at the display. It was Soph. I desperately did not want to interrupt what was happening here, but my sisters came first. I’d just answer quick and call her back later.

“It’s Soph,” I said.

Liam nodded. He’d always understood the Blumer sister bond.

“Hi, Soph,” I said. “It’s not the best time right now, can I call—”

“Em is missing,” Soph interrupted. She sounded upset and my stomach clenched.

“What?” I asked. “That’s not possible. I just saw her last night.”

“She never showed up for our lunch date today,” Soph said.

“Maybe she didn’t want you to see her hair,” I suggested. “She’s been acting really weird.”

Liam watched me with eyebrows raised, and I made a sorry face and held up a finger to indicate I just needed a moment. He unstrapped the helmet off the back while he waited. As he stood there with the Pacific breeze tousling his dark brown hair, I almost forgot I was on the phone.

“Jules, it gets worse.” The tight note of anxiety in Soph’s voice brought my attention back to her.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“I’ve been calling and texting her cell phone all day and there’s been no answer until just a few minutes ago,” Soph said.

“So, you got in touch with her?” I tried hard to track why my usually calm older sister was worried.

“No! A man answered,” Soph said. “A strange man.”

I gasped. Our innocent Emily?

“I know,” Soph said. “Jules, I’m scared. He sounded like a very bad man, and when I demanded to speak to Emily, he hung up on me and when I called back it went right to voice mail. Jules, I think she’s been abducted.”

My insides went cold, and it occurred to me that terror had its own temperature—like ice, freezing my lungs and making it hard to breathe.

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