Page 135 of Fearless

Slowly, Pae drops to her knees beside him. His skin is leeched of all color, contrasting starkly with the dark vest hugging him tightly. Blood stains his clothing, surrounding that silver dagger in a pool of crimson. With shaking fingers, Paedyn traces the soiled seam of his vest. She sucks in a breath before following the rise and fall of every pocket stitched onto it.

Her fingers stumble over a string of stitched words. The blue thread is splotched with blood, dulled beneath one of the many pockets. I hear Paedyn’s breath catch before the murmured words that follow. “See you in the sky.”

Eyes wide and rimmed with tears, she lifts her gaze to mine. “He was trying to say that in the arena. He was dying, and that was the last thing he wanted to say.”

“Paedyn…” I crouch beside her and place a gentle hand on her back at the same moment Kitt rests one on her shoulder. Our eyes meet for a single, uncomfortable moment, in which we glimpse the rest of our lives. Paedyn will always be between us. Soon, she will no longer be mine to comfort, mine to have.

And pathetically I will still love her. She is forever lodged within me, the only pure spot on my stained soul. But for now, I do not pull away. Not until vows are wedged between us, and that ring on her finger holds a greater weight. Until then, I will have her in whatever way she lets me.

“Even after our time on Loot together, he still blamed me for Adena’s death,” Paedyn breathes. Her fingers curl around the vest’s perfect hem. “The way he was fighting… he really did want to hurt me.”

My stomach twists, hating that she ever believed it to be me in that ring with her. But tensions were high, and this Wielder was there to play a part—me.

“He wanted to avenge her.” She shakes her head. “I can’t blame him for that. I only blame myself.”

My eyes meet Kitt’s over the worried girl between us. She leans back slowly on her heels, a silent stream of tears decorating her skin. “But he decided not to kill me,” she murmurs. “He could have killed me. If we hadn’t met, I wonder if things would have been different.”

Paedyn’s head falls onto my shoulder, and for a moment, I forget my brother’s presence. Kitt looks away, his throat bobbing with emotion. Perhaps it’s envy, irritation, even, and I hate it. This is all wrong, seeing him like this. Being like this with him—

Paedyn slips an arm through Kitt’s, tugging him close.

I stiffen slightly, Kitt doing the same at the sudden inclusion. But Paedyn doesn’t so much as flinch. She simply stares at the body before us, her own pressed between two brothers.

The sheer vastness of Pae’s grief pulls my attention back to her. She clings to Kitt’s arm with her head tipped against my shoulder. I also know this girl better than she lets most. I can read each tremble and unspoken word.

She wants silence. She wants to sit in this grief. And when she is ready to be pulled out, her betrothed and his brother are right here to do so.

“We never got to say goodbye to her.” Paedyn’s whispered words are not meant for our ears. “But at least we could share how much we both loved her.”

It’s a long while before she breaks away from the press of our bodies and lifts a hesitant hand toward the Wielder’s glassy gaze. She shuts his eyes gently, offering him the peaceful end she couldn’t give in the arena. Numbly, Paedyn straightens his vest before brushing stray strands of hair from his cool forehead.

“Take care of her for me,” she whispers atop his pale skin. “Take care of her, Mak.”

I almost don’t hear her final, broken whisper.

“See you in the sky.”

CHAPTER 50Paedyn

I hardly remember leaving the dungeons.

Even less is recalled after returning to my room.

It was harder knowing him.

The corpse had a name.

Mak.

Mak.

MAK.

Dead bodies have no use for names.

The last piece of Adena died in my arms, just as she had.

He wore her vest. And now it keeps his dead body warm.

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