Page 188 of Fearless

And then I’ll have my brother back.

I took a dose of the Plague.

Maybe it was a mistake. I read in Father’s letter how he gave a dose to Ava when she was born. He was so terrified of having a weak child that he did everything he could to prevent it. But Ava was only a child—she could not survive the sickness.

When I told the Scholars of my plans for Ilya, they adamantly informed me that there was not enough research done on what would happen to an Elite who took another portion of the Plague. So I became their test subject before they could object. Now they are forced to do everything they can to keep me alive.

I haven’t told Kai about the truth of Ava’s death—about anything, really. But I will survive this Plague. I have to. I have to be great. Father always thought I was too soft, too weak. Now I will be far more powerful than he ever was. I only need to live.

Kai,

You should be back by now.

Did you run away with her? Did you abandon our forever for a chance at one with our father’s murderer?

You still love her, don’t you?

Don’t you see how she drove us apart? She ruined us.

Come home. Please.

All will be as it once was.

The Scholars are fighting me.

They want to hoard our abilities like the kings before had. The Healers monitor me closely, waiting for the first signs of sickness—and whether or not I will survive it.

I force them all to fall in line with my plan.

I am not the kings before.

My Enforcer is back with my betrothed.

He brought her home to me.

Perhaps his loyalty still resides with me. Perhaps I’ve misjudged his feelings for Paedyn. Ridding her from our lives may be easier than I thought.

The court was shocked by my decree. The people must welcome Ordinaries into Ilya so the surrounding cities will welcome us. They have yet to discover how great I will make this kingdom—how far I will stretch our borders.

Paedyn let me slip that ring onto her finger because she hopes for a united Ilya. But I will unite far more than Ilya.

Every city inked onto our maps, from the Shallows to the Scorches, will be ours.

For my own legacy. For my brother. For us.

The bombing at the parade was unpleasant, but effective.

Easel pushed for Paedyn to prove herself to the kingdom by entering another set of Trials—just like I’d planned. I want her gone, and the people want a distraction. But she will be of use to me if she lives to see her second Trial.

I will have Paedyn sail to Izram and leave behind a crate of roses laced with the Plague. If my bandits kill her before then, I will start with Dor.

I’m coughing now, but I do my best to hide it. I don’t want Kai to worry. Several Healers and Scholars document my progress daily. Foul-tasting herbs are forced down my throat in the hopes that they will aid my chances of survival.

Nothing is stronger than a woman who is told she’s weak.

Something has changed in Paedyn. These Trials have only empowered her. Part of me almost wants to admire her resilience.

We have spent several civil moments together, all while I bite my tongue and smother my feelings. I was wrong to think Kai abandoned his love for her. The twoare closer than ever, and I am the one who drove them together. I see the way my brother looks at her, devotion slipping beneath the mask of stoicism Father taught him to wear.