Page 30 of Fearless

Ten lazy beats of my heart, and I’m crawling out of bed.

My mind aches for a distraction from the deafening thoughts. And my body, tired as it is, itches to move. Or maybe I’m tired of feeling useless, feeling trapped in this life I don’t know how to live. Plagues, I was just beginning to figure out how to live the unfortunate one I had before everything went to shit.

I’m suddenly striding down a dark hall, arms crossed over the thin sleeping shirt I wear. The most I’d done before stepping out of my room was slip on my boots. Changing before this impulsive escapade might have been a good idea, but I’m already nearing the door I know leads to the training yard beyond.

The guards stationed there shift on tired feet at the sight of me, their masks doing nothing to conceal the clear disdain beneath. They know better than to stand in my way, not with the ring that glitters on my finger. So, with my head raised stubbornly high, I stride past and push through the door.

The night is cooler than I’d anticipated, each whisper of wind pebbling the skin on my bare arms. Moonlight pools on the path long worn into the ground. Following it, I lift my gaze to the black sky draped above and speckled with stars. They seem to blink back at me, leaning in to help guide my steps.

The first circle of dirt comes into view, blanketed in shadows. I follow the path, letting it lead me between each training ring. Flickering flame floods the farthest circle of dirt to illuminate a formidable shadow, sharp like the sword he holds. I know who stands within that halo of light.

But when a second figure flickers into focus beside him, I falter.

“… couldn’t sleep, but it seems you can’t either.”

Kitt.

My breath catches.

I would rather not let my betrothed know I came out here to meet his brother.

With that in mind, I crouch low to the ground and creep silently to a ring beside the brothers. Shadows clothe me from sight until I’ve slipped behind the weapons’ rack. Blowing out a breath, I peek through one of the many gnarled holes in this wall of wood, my gaze narrowing on the king and his Enforcer.

“I thought I might find you out here,” Kitt was saying. “It’s good to be back in this training yard with you. Just like old times.”

“If it were really like old times,” Kai muses, “you would be sprawled in the dirt already.”

Kitt laughs, a sound so genuine I nearly startle. It’s as though I’m suddenly back beside that fountain in the gardens, splashing a boyish prince unashamedly. “You think you could still take me, Brother? We haven’t sparred since you found a better partner.”

The tips of my ears burn.

“Come on, Kitt.” The Enforcer’s tone is deceptively casual. “That was during the Purging Trials. Things haven’t been like that for a long while.” Despite knowing the truth of our relationship, Kai’s nonchalance still manages to sting me. “Besides,” he sighs. “You’re the one who’s marrying her.”

And there is that twinge of jealousy.

“It is what needs to be done. You understand that.” Kitt runs a hand through his hair, looking younger beside his brother. “For the kingdom. And for us.”

Kai stifles his scoff. “For us?”

“Yes.” It’s a simple word, yet it holds so much defiance from the king. “I know your relationship with Father was strained. More than strained,” he amends quickly. “I don’t want that for us. What I want is to be brothers again, without orders you detest shoved between us. And with the Ilya I am rebuilding, you won’t need to hunt down Ordinaries anymore.” Knowing his brother more than most, he reassures, “I won’t make you hurt anyone.”

I can’t make out Kai’s face in the flickering torchlight, but I know gratitude paints the planes of it. “Thank you, Brother.”

Kitt nods earnestly, waiting a long moment before speaking again. “But after this bombing at the parade, I’ve been advised to ensure our army is ready for whatever threats may arise. Especially now that our borders have opened. You know how Father grew a bit lax with training over the years.”

“He didn’t believe we would need to fight very many battles,” Kai recalls.

My legs ache from kneeling on the hard ground, but I don’t dare shift this close to the keen Enforcer. I watch as Kitt absentmindedly crushes clumps of dirt beneath his shoe. “Now anything could happen. So I need you to focus your attention on rebuilding our forces and training new recruits.”

“New recruits?” Kai echoes.

I can just make out the smile that transforms the king’s tired face. “I want you to train Ordinaries.”

My heart stalls its rhythmic beat.

“After the bombing,” Kitt continues, “it became clear to me how vulnerable Ordinaries really are in this kingdom—”

“No shit,” I breathe recklessly into the darkness.

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