Page 62 of Save the Date

“MAYBE WE SHOULD HIRE A REAL EDITOR?” JACKIE ASKEDas she and Imani crowded around Emma’s laptop. Jackie had laid out a spread of snacks and champagne to celebrate Emma’s engagement and make the most of her proposal video. They had just spent the last half hour attempting to coherently intercut Nicolas’s footage with a video of Emma explaining what it felt like to get engaged for the second time. It wasn’t going well.

“I think it’s fine. YouTube is chaotic anyway,” Imani countered. “No one expects it to be perfect.”

“I just need to figure out how to blend the two audio tracks,” Emma lamented as she tried to be precise on iMovie, which required a level of fine motor skills she did not possess.

“This is so dumb. Let me just hire a professional. We don’t want to blow a chance to go viral just to save a few bucks.” Jackie was already reaching for her phone, so Emma closed her laptop and gave in.

“Fine, but I want final approval.”

“I personally think you should do the whole thing in black and white with a kind of ominous space opera feel,” Imani suggested as Jackie looked at her in total confusion.

“She’s kidding,” Emma clarified. “Imani thinks this whole idea is a disaster waiting to happen.”

“What? Why?”

“Why do I think Emma marrying some random finance guy to prove a point is a bad idea?” Imani asked sarcastically. “Hard to say.”

“Have you met Matt yet?” Jackie asked. “Because once you meet him you won’t be worried. He’s a gem.”

“Jackie’s in love with my fiancé,” Emma joked before realizing how strange it felt to refer to someone other than Ryan as her fiancé. She made a note of the sensation on her phone so she’d remember to bring it up on the podcast. Will had told her to jot down her thoughts as they came up so she’d remember what each stage of the operation felt like. She’d taken his advice but had failed to inform him that she’d been officially engaged for almost a week now. Even though they were basically texting each other all day, every day. The podcast was about to launch and all the work that required had forced them to shift into what was finally starting to feel like a friendship. A friendship with a romantic history, but a friendship nonetheless.

Emma rationalized her reluctance to share the big news with Will by convincing herself it would be better to do it in person and on mic. But part of her acknowledged that once Will knew about the ring that was currently being resized by Matt’s jeweler, things could change between them. Will might pull back just as Emma was starting to become more and more reliant on his emotional support and witty retorts. She could tell Will was expecting her plan to fail and wasn’t sure how he would react to learning it was going better than she had ever imagined.

“How could I not love Matt?” Jackie replied to Emma’s jab. “He’s going to be my brother-in-law and he has excellent taste in diamond rings.”

Emma didn’t have the heart to tell Jackie that while the ring was beautiful, it didn’t feel likeher. She’d preferred the three-stone arrangement with a yellow gold band that Ryan had found after Emma sent him a series of inspo photos. Her new ring felt rather ostentatious for a therapist who rented an office space next to an El Pollo Loco. But maybe her clients would see it as proof that she knew what she was talking about.

“Doyoulove Matt, Emma?” Imani asked as she popped a pita chip in her mouth.

“Oh, you know, what even is love? Is it a feeling? Is it a moment in time?” Emma mused in an attempt to evade the question. Based on Imani’s and Jackie’s faces, it hadn’t worked.

“Have you said ‘I love you’ to each other yet?” Imani probed.

“No. But I think that’s okay. We had a big discussion the other night about doing things on our own timeline and not having to follow the standard order of a relationship.”

“I love that,” Jackie said with a vigorous head nod. “He seems so understanding.”

“Yeah, it took a lot of the pressure off,” Emma admitted as she tried to determine whether to share the next part. She was afraid of Imani’s reaction, but talking things out with trusted confidantes wasn’t something she could only recommend for other people without doing it herself. “He even suggested that we wait until the wedding to…you know.”

The silence that followed felt like the worst drop in a rollercoaster ride. It instantly filled Emma with regret and a wave of nausea.

“You aren’t going to sleep with him before you get married?” Imani finally asked, rather diplomatically. That’s how Emma knew it was bad; Imani saved diplomacy for dire situations.

“Nope. He thinks—wethink—that waiting might help set us up for a more successful marriage.”

“How?”

When Matt had pitched the idea, it had made sense to Emma, but now that she was trying to replay his argument, the logic was foggier. “It will…make it more sacred.”

Imani snorted in disdain. “Since when does sex have to be sacred?”

“It doesn’t,” Emma clarified. “I think he just wants to try something different after what happened in his last marriage. He’s still recovering, and I don’t want him to do anything he isn’t ready to do yet.”

“Wait,” Jackie interjected. “He’sthe one who asked to wait? I didn’t know men did that. Do you think there’s something wrong with his…” Jackie gestured down below.

“Not that I know of. And even if there was, it wouldn’t be the end of the world. There are plenty of workarounds.” Emma thought about the weeklong, incredibly informative seminar she’d attended on sexual dysfunction the previous year. “I just think he needs to trust me more or something. And once we’re married, we’ll have built that trust.”

Imani snorted again.