Page 26 of The Hermit on the Hill

"No. I just thought Sam should be the first to know… Other than you… and I wanted to have a plan in place. I don't want Mom to worry."

He pushed to his feet, his calm falling away as his expression hardened. "She and May and Cody and Noah would all have helped you, Jenna. You never had to do this alone. If Cody and Noah had known what was going on, they never would have shown up at Sam's and…" He rubbed his beard and bits of mud showered to the floor. "Yeah, they still would have tried to cover him in syrup and feathers and glitter, but they'd have been doing it for the right reason. Why do you have to make everything so hard on yourself? Do you feel like you deserve to be punished?"

Why people got so hurt by me wanting to do things alone would never make sense to me. I was protecting my family from worry. I handled things best on my own and I'd needed time to accept how my life was going to change and to research my options. Jared wouldn't understand or accept those explanations, though.

"I'm sorry," I said instead, because there was nothing else I could say to him without lying. "But I'm glad you're here. Want to see a picture of your nephew?"

"Of course," he said, but I could tell the distraction hadn't satisfied him.

I grabbed my purse from the hook by the door and pulled out the ultrasound picture. He stared at it for several long moments. After years of vet school, he could probably see more from it than I could. I should have showed it to Sam.

When Jared handed back the photo, his smile was jubilant. "He's perfect, Jenna. Congratulations."

Tears sprang to my eyes, and I swallowed hard. "Thank you. Want to see what I have for him so far?"

He nodded, and I led him to the second bedroom. I probably should have mentioned he'd need to sleep on the couch when he'd asked to stay. I opened the door and Jared whistled.

"Um, Jenna. How many babies do you think you're having? 'Cause I just saw one on the ultrasound."

I looked over the boxes and piles and felt slightly ill. Babies were expensive, and I'd put everything on my credit card in Atlanta, planning to pay it off once I'd arrived and had a regular paycheck again. Now, I would have to do some creative budgeting.

I walked into the room and laid a hand on the rocking bassinet that sensed movement and played music. "This is for when he's a newborn. It's the highest-rated bassinet out there and it gives me options, because not every baby wants motion or music."

I pointed to the big box next to it, which contained the crib I hadn't put together yet. "This is for when he's older. It converts into a toddler bed, so it's a great investment. I know I don't need it yet, but it was on sale and I figured it couldn't hurt." I showed him the two different baby bathtubs I'd gotten, because I wanted to try them out before I settled on one, the medicines and tools for when the baby was sick, the clothes and the diapers and the mobile and the noise machine and the monitor and the —

"You know, most babies don't really need all this stuff."

"How do you know that, Jared? How many babies have you raised? I've done my research and I want to be as prepared as possible."

Jared held up his hands. "You're right. I have no idea what goes into raising a baby. But you know, you could have asked for all this stuff at your baby shower."

"I don't need a shower." I ran a hand over a soft baby blanket. "And what's the point of asking other people to buy me stuff when I'm perfectly capable of buying it myself?"

"Are you capable?" he asked in that gentle voice he used when he was talking to a skittish calf. "You don't have a job here yet."

I glared, annoyed with him treating me like I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. "But I will have a job. I'll find a great one."

"Have you thought about moving in with Sam? Brit says he's just a grump on the outside and a total marshmallow on the inside."

I marched out of the baby's room and waited until Jared had stepped out and shut the door. I didn't want anger to taint my baby's room.

"I don't even know the man. And I can take care of myself and of this baby. I don't need Sam's charity or his manipulation."

Jared went still, his gaze intense. "Did he manipulate you?"

I sighed. "No. He's not manipulative. He's brash and pushy and obnoxious, but there's nothing subtle about him."

Jared relaxed. "Brittany says he'd walk through fire for his family."

"And that's enough for you? You think I should give up my independence and move in with a virtual stranger?"

"I think you should accept his help. If you don't want to move in with him, fine. At least let him pay your rent. It's probably less than what you've spent on baby supplies, and he's a parent, too. He's legally and morally responsible for half of your baby's care and financial costs."

"He doesn't have to be." I was so exhausted. "It was my choice to keep this baby. If it's not what he wants, I won't ask him for anything."

Jared's smile surprised me. "If it wasn't what he wanted, he wouldn't be trying to convince you to move in and let him take care of the both of you."

"Or maybe he wants to take my baby from me." My voice shook as I voiced my biggest fear. Without a job and a steady income, I'd be more vulnerable to an attempt by Sam to claim full custody of our child.

---