Page 36 of Off the Wall

“What if I told you joining Swipe Rite won’t cost you a dime?”

“Then I’d say that’s even worse.” A tiny snort slips out of me. “I’ve heard the free tiers for dating apps are a complete disaster.”

“Not at Swipe Rite. We have the absolute best matchmaking algorithm in the business, and we’re not only offering you our premium package at zero charge, we’re offering topayyou to go on dates.”

“Wait, what?”

“We want to pay you to go on dates for us,” she repeats.

“Me?” I cough out a laugh. “But … why?”

“You live in Serendipity Springs, correct? At The Serendipity apartment building.”

My pulse picks up and a thread of unease works its way around my ribs. “Who did you say you were again?”

“Jemma Lane,” she repeats. “And you’re Nori Sinclair. Twenty-seven years old, still single, but determined to find your soulmate. Unfortunately”—she pauses for a smalltsk—“you’ve been on quite a few disappointing dates lately, haven’t you?”

Disappointing dates?

How does this Jemma Lane person even know that my recent setups were?—

Ahhh. I let out a quick cackle. This situation has my favorite middle school teacher written all over it. “Hayden put you up to this, didn’t she?”

There’s a brief pause. “I’m not at liberty to divulge how we found out about you, Nori.”

“Well.” I shake my head. “I’m sorry to tell you this, but my best friend wasted your time. She knows I’m not into dating apps.”

“As I mentioned before, Swipe Rite isn’t just any dating app,” Jemma persists. “And we think you’re the perfect person to help us spread our unique message.”

“And how exactly would you expect me to do that?”

“By being the featured single in our big Spring Into Love promotional campaign.”

I pull down my brow. “What does that even mean?”

“With your permission, we’ll curate the perfect profile for you, then let our algorithm do the rest. Of course, your case will work a little differently than the typical dating app experience. We’ll do immediate screening of your potential matches to speed up the process and give our audience theperceptionof our actual services, but condensed. Think of it as Swipe Right, only supercharged.”

“But … why?”

“Our goal is to trace one hopeful young woman’s journey to finding her soulmate,” she explains. “And to prove Swipe Rite’s the best site to accomplish this, we’ll be matching you with ten different eligible men, and sending you on ten different wonderful dates!”

I huff out a laugh. “And how is all that datingnotgoing to cost me money?”

“We’re securing sponsorships from local businesses who will cover all the expenses. In fact, I can text you the names of some of the locations we’ve already arranged.”

Within seconds, my phone pings with a list of proposed dates. There’s axe throwing at some medieval-themed restaurant that sounds like an adult Chuck E. Cheese. A pottery session at a place called Kil-N-Me Softly. Grape crushing at a vineyard halfway between here and Worcester. A night in an escape room. A private cooking lesson at Aria, which comes with an asterisk about this being the first time their chef has ever agreed to teach a class.

Before I can read any further, Jemma interrupts.

“We’re still waiting on a few more places to commit,” she says, “but these are the kinds of activities you can expect.”

I puff out a laugh of disbelief. “Why on earth would these businesses want to subsidizemydating life?”

“Because they’ll be featured in our ad campaign too,” Jemma says. “A Swipe Rite marketing representative will be discreetly planted at every location we’ve partnered with to take pictures and videos of you with your match. Another rep will write up ad copy for the footage which we’ll air on our social media channels and even in some television spots. Allyouhave to do is fill out a questionnaire, answer a few writing prompts, and send some pictures for us to choose from. We’ll craft the perfect profile and match you with the bachelors most likely to engage our audience.”

A scoff sneaks out of me. “Isn’t that false advertising?”

“It’s just plain old advertising,” she quips. “And we’re confident your story will drum up record signups this summer. You just show up to the dates and let the public watch you fall head over heels in love!”

---