Page 44 of Heatwaves

“Why thank you, kind sir.” I grin, ducking to climb in when he stops me.

“Lil,” he sighs, shaking his head. “I know you don’t want to talk about it, but I think youshould hear them out. At least find outwhythey disappeared.”

I shake my head, cutting him off. “I don’t need to hear them out. I don’t care why they disappeared. I’m over them.”

He makes a face but doesn’t argue with me as he leans down to press his lips to mine. I melt into the kiss, clinging to his shirt.

He pulls back entirely too soon for my liking. “I love you, Lil.”

My entire body locks up at his words.

Attempting to extract myself from his hold, I sigh.

“Wyatt…“ He doesn’t release me, and I grind my teeth before meeting his eyes once more. “You’re important to me—you know that—“

He cuts me off with a scoff, releasing me as he steps back and shakes his head. “That right there? That’s why you need to talk to them. You can’t even admit how you feel about me.”

Glancing away, I bite my lip. “This was never supposed to be more than friends with benefits, Wy. If you—“

“Don’t pull that shit on me, Lil. Don’t act like you feel nothing for me. I know what this was supposed to be, and I also know that’s not whatit is anymore. I understand why you can’t admit it, but don’t lie to my fucking face.”

Wincing at his words, I turn my attention back to him. Hurt is written all over his face and in his body language.

I’ve hurt him—again.

That’s what I do every time. I really need to give him up and let him move on. I just can’t bring myself to do it.

“I’m sorry,” I murmur, and he scoffs again.

“Whatever. Just remember one thing, Lil. There’s only so many times you can push me away before I have to start listening to what you’re telling me. One day, you’re going to push too far, and then I’ll be gone. Where will you be then?”

I gasp, lifting a hand to my chest as pain radiates through it, but I don’t stop him.

I never do.

He doesn’t turn back, nor does he look up when he pulls out of my driveway.

Fuck. I really need that swim now.

As if on autopilot, I climb into my car and drive to the cliffs. Putting my car into park, I climb out and take a deep breath.

The salt air instantly makes me feel better as I head down to the beach. Stopping in the softsand, my eyes bounce across the waves. When I see no one, a sigh of relief escapes me. Pulling my dress off, I drop it to the sand and walk into the water. Once I’m deep enough, I shift.

As my form shifts from human into beluga, I feel at peace for the first time in days.

This is so what I needed.

There’s something special about swimming in the ocean. It’s so quiet down here.

It’s my favorite place to go if I need time to think—or, like today,notthink—in peace.

This is my true happy place. The place I can go to escape it all. To just be me.

With a flick of my tail, I head back to the surface to take a much-needed breath. I have a habit of leaving it until the last minute. And how embarrassing would it be to drown as a whale shifter?

As I dive back under, a whale calls out, and I spin around.

Coming toward me are two gigantic whales, a narwhal, and a walrus.