Page 59 of Winds of Destiny

In less than five minutes, the flotilla is completely ablaze. As soon as Kai sheathes his sword, I step up to his side, close enough that our shoulders are touching, and we stand in silent satisfaction as we watch the death of at least part of Embros’s plans.

…

We wake up to find that our rams rejoined us overnight and are placidly grazing a few yards away from the still-smoking wreckage we caused. I try not to show my surprise that they’ve returned, because if I’ve learned anything over the past week with Kai, it’s that he has to be one of the luckiest men in existence. The fact that either of us is still alive is proof of that.

We pick up the pace as we leave the water behind—we have to. I can’t know for sure how long it will take Embros and his chariots to reach the boats they undoubtedly have waiting for them, but it’s safest to assume that we’re behind and every moment counts. If things were less dire, I’m sure Kai would object to how hard I’m pushing myself now. Luckily, yesterday didn’t set my healing back too far. I’m notcomfortableby any stretch of the imagination, but at least I’m able to endure without truly hurting myself.

Still, the first day’s ride is a strange one. Kai says next to nothing every time we take a break to rest the rams and eat. He isn’t eating as much as he ought to, either. The man weighs half again more than me—he needs food, and, although plain, we have it. Yet he resists, too lost in thought to remember the basics.Brooding. Ugh, I’m going to have to talk to him after all.

It isn’t until that evening, when he turns away from me instead of opening his arms to me as he has for the past week, that I finally decide it’s time to revisit our brief conversation from earlier about his father. I’m not going to let him stew in a broth of resentment for however long it takes him to get over it when we’ve got more important things to focus on.

Not to mention that I don’t like seeing him hurting. I’m not like Cam, though; I can’t talk people out of their pain by distracting them with fanciful words. All I can do is—well, is all that he did for me.

“Come here.”

Kai pauses, then looks over his shoulder at me. “What?”

“You heard me.” I don’t want to have to repeat it.

He rolls over but doesn’t move any closer. “I’d have thought you’d be happy to have your space back now that you’re feeling so much better.”

Is that a bitter tinge to his voice?

“Well, you thought wrong,” I say. The fact that he’s making me spell out what I want—and what heneeds—is kind of infuriating. “You ruined me for sleeping on the ground in the space of a single week.” If I sound a little sour about it, whatever—this part is true, too, although I’m sure I’ll adapt again quickly when I have to.

I don’t have to, though. Not yet.

“So unless you don’t care about leaving me unable to sleep for the next however-long we spend on the road, get over here. Please,” I add, as if that’ll make a difference.

Maybe it does. Kai stares at me for a long moment, then sighs and scoots over so that our shoulders are touching. It’s enough—I drape myself over his chest and tuck my top leg between his calves, and instantly my body relaxes like I’ve just drunk far too much wine.

“That’s better,” I say with satisfaction.

Kai chuckles, and I hide my smile against his collarbone. “You just want me for my body.”

“Obviously.”

Except that’s not true. Not anymore. It wasn’t his body that kept me going after we lost Cam, although that certainly did help. It’s hisheartthat kept me moving, his faith in both his god and our quest, not to mention the faith he has in Cam. He’s been certain this whole time that we’re going to find him again. For his sake and for mine, I can’t let that faith falter. I need him whole.

“You already knew your father was a son of a bitch,” I say quietly. Kai stiffens but gradually relaxes as I stroke my hand down his side, the same way I used to gentle Lulu by smoothing out the feathers on her flank. “Why does it make a difference to know he’s been plotting against you for longer than you thought?”

“Because…” Kai trails off, and I wonder for a moment if I’m going to have to prod him again—maybe literally. Then he says, “It means that everything that happened between then and now has been a lie. I knew—I assumed—that the deal between my father and Embros occurred when Embros visited us four months ago. If it’s been a full year, then that’s how long my father has been planning to kill me. Through the fruit festival, through the anniversary of my mother’s death, through my birthday celebrations, he’s been planning to kill me.

“He fought me so hard on the engagement to Camrael when I first brought the idea up.” Kai’s voice is wispy now, as thin as smoke. “I sent the first messages about the match to King Perael seven months ago. It took time to work out the details, since news between our cities doesn’t travel fast, but as soon as he found out, my father wasfurious.He absolutely forbade it, but everything he said to me then, all the stuff about respecting our history and taking pride in putting Huridell first—all that wasafterhe’d decided to take measures that he knew I would never, ever agree to. I just don’t understand it. I don’t understand him.”

I see the shape of the problem now, but I don’t know what to do with it. How do you comfort a man whose father turns out to be as bad as Anarx? “I don’t understand it, either,” I say at last. “Perhaps it’s impossible to understand. Or maybe we just need Cam to explain it to us.”

“We’ll have to ask him when we find him,” Kai agrees. Silence fills the air for a few minutes, but just as I begin to drift off to sleep, Kai asks, “Speaking of our prince, does he know you’re in love with him?”

I sit up, sleepy languor entirely gone, and glare at him. “What?”

Kai remains where he is, eyes wide, blinking rapidly, his hands still outstretched to the place I extracted myself from. “You can’t possibly think that it was a secret.”

“I…” To be honest, I didn’t think Kai would look close enough to notice my feelings for Cam, not when he was in the process of falling in love with him himself. “Tell me I wasn’t that obvious.”

“You weren’t that obvious,” he repeats dutifully. “At least not until after the attack. Having a strong sense of duty is commendable, but you were ready to run off into the grass with your kidney hanging out your back, so—”

I smack his side. “It wasn’t that bad!”

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