Page 2 of Empty Net

Hayes: Keller…

Locke: Careful, guys. I can hear him growling from here.

Lawson: And here we thought Hutch was the growly one.

Keller: They’re both growly. At least when they want to be.

Lawson: As if you have any room to talk.

Lawson: You’re the dick, Hutch is the grump, Hayes is the protective one, Locke is the old man, and Fox is the good boy.

Locke: I’m not old, dammit!

Me: Stop saying I’m a good boy. I can be bad.

Hayes: Only a good boy would say something like “I can be bad.”

Keller: You forgot to say you’re the obnoxious one, Lawsy.

Lawson: I’m not obnoxious. I’m lovable!

Hutch: You’re obnoxious.

Lawson: And lovable!

Locke: Annoying.

Lawson: And lovable!

Hayes: Exasperating.

Lawson: And lovable!

Me: I love you, Lawsy.

Lawson: See? Told you I’m lovable!

Lawson: Now that we’ve established that, gather around, boys, because I have a question for you.

Lawson: What car would you give a mildly enthusiastic hand job to own?

Hayes: Is it wrong that I’m not even surprised by this question?

Hutch: At this point, I’ve come to expect it.

Locke: We really should be more concerned about him, but this seems perfectly in line with Lawson.

Me: I’m concerned but also intrigued to see the responses…

Keller: I have a few follow-up questions. What does “mildly enthusiastic” mean exactly? Like, do I need to smile? Do I have to make eye contact? Can I put a divider between us? And also, will the car be in immaculate condition, and does it have to be a real car? Can it be a ship?

Hutch: I’m not sure if I’m impressed by the thought you put into this or curious as to why you’re so eager to offer a hand job for a car.

Keller: Or ship. We don’t know yet. We’re still hashing out the details.

Locke: Excellent point, Kells. Lawson?

Lawson: It can be a ship.

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