Page 10 of Protecting his Heart

The drive was quiet, fraught with tension, but Owen couldn’t bring himself to break it. He wasn’t sure he was ready. Despite what he’d acknowledged to Evan and his mother, he was riding the edge of a ravine and unsure which way was the right way to go without falling off.

Evan hung the keys up on the hooks they kept beside the door, and Owen stared at the floor, his hands shoved deep into his pockets to hide their trembling. He couldn’t do it. Not right then.

“I need…” He exhaled. “I need time,” he whispered.

Evan sighed. “You have it. Whatever you need, whenever you need it.”

Owen strode for his bedroom but froze a few steps away. Inhaling, he turned back and stopped in front of Evan. “Goodnight,” he whispered, leaning forward to kiss one cheek and then the other. Then he turned and closed himself away in his room, breathing as if he’d run a marathon.

“What the hell am I doing?” he whispered.

Shaking his head, he entered his en suite and turned the water as hot as he could stand it. As the water rained down on him, he thought back to his words that morning.

We’ve ruined everything. This was a mistake. We can’t do this again.

The words had done exactly what his mother had said—broken them both. He wasn’t sure he could ever atone for the hurt he’d caused, but he could try. They were walking on eggshells around each other, and it had to stop. He wanted his best friend back in more than location.

Did he have the courage to reach for what he wanted? To heal the wounds he’d caused? To risk everything for the one person he wanted more than anything else in the world?

He wanted to say he did, but he couldn’t right then. The idea of potentially losing everything was terrifying, even balanced against the idea that he could have everything he wanted if it turned out right.

The future was uncertain, and he hated it. He should be used to it, with his job being as unpredictable as it was. There was no denying he needed to talk to Evan, but he needed to shore himself up against the chances of him rejecting him. He needed to expect it because if Evan turned him down, he needed to be okay with that.

Well, he needed to be an excellent actor, at least.

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Chapter 4

Evan

It went against Evan’s instincts to let Owen hide away when he’d cracked open the door that might help them heal, but he also knew how stubborn Owen could be. After years of being friends, he needed space to wrap his head around everything, and then he would approach Evan. But this time around, Evan would give him a day at most. More than that and Owen would retreat completely.

He headed for the kitchen, needing some caffeine, and set the pot going. Leaning back against the counter, he watched it, though his mind was really on the tentative elastic band stretched between them from Owen’s earlier words. A band that could easily snap with the wrong move.

Owen had said he’d thought it was the right choice. But the right choice for who? It was a question he’d need to ask. His phone rang, and he pulled it from his pocket, smiling when Matteo’s name came up.

“Hey, how’re things?” he said.

Matteo sighed. “Busy, as always. I’m finally getting my dinner. We had a rush of patients when a car accident came in. Craziness doesn’t cover it.”

Matteo was a nurse, too. He worked slightly different shift patterns to Evan, but they’d bonded over the handover one night and become friends after Matteo had tried to tempt Evan intobed. Unfortunately for them both, neither were the other’s type. Matteo wanted a Daddy, and Evan was not one.

“I can imagine. Make sure you eat properly.”

Matteo scoffed. “You know I don’t cook, so it’s ham sandwiches and crisps for me.”

Evan huffed. “Where’s your Daddy when you need one?”

“Well, I quite like the idea of that Dr Wallis. He’s quite the eye candy.”

“Leave the doctors alone. You know you shouldn’t mix pleasure and business.”

“But why the hell not?” Matteo whined.

“Did you want to see the person you’re supposed to be fucking? Or just imagine they’re there with you?”

Matteo groaned. “Stop making sense. It’s far too late in the day for that.”

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