Page 69 of Beck

“And he’s still breathing?” Dallas growled.

“Barely,” Beck said.

“What is the plan now?” Dallas asked. “Where do you go from here?”

Beck shrugged. “I have no idea. Like I said, it’s all material stuff, so it doesn’t really matter. There was nothing in that house that I’m worried about losing, for the most part. Nothing sentimental, thankfully.”

Although Beck said that like it was a good thing, it made Kole sad. Everybody needed some sentimental items, but it seemed like Beck had never had the opportunity. If there was one thingthey were going to change, Kole would make sure Beck had plenty of things that reminded him of what they’d done and where they’d been. He could understand how difficult it was, even if Beck seemed like he could easily brush it aside. Maybe it was because he was in the foster care system for so long that he believed it wouldn’t stick. Kole would make him see otherwise. If it took him all the years he had in this life, he would show Beck he was important enough for people to stay around him.

Instead of snuggling up on the sofa in Kole’s apartment like he had thought they would, he guided Beck to the bedroom, settling him up against the headboard while Kole pottered around getting things together so they wouldn’t have to move until the following morning unless they wanted to. Beck laughed at him when he told him that after Beck enquired about what he was doing.

“You’re making a nest?”

“Yep. No reason to leave this bed at all, as far as I’m concerned.”

Beck chuckled. “I like that idea.”

“Me, too.” He climbed in, nestling himself on Beck’s good side so he didn’t inadvertently hurt him, and held out the remote. “You choose.”

“I must be ill. It’s not like you to give up the remote,” he joked, then looked at the remote. “What is this?”

Kole’s cheeks heated. “Don’t know what you mean—it came that way.” Beck raised his eyebrows. “Anyway… You might be an invalid right now, but I can still punish you.”

Beck’s eyes widened, and he licked his lips, swallowing hard. “Hmm. I’ll take that under advisement.”

Despite the sad reason behind them being where they were, Kole couldn’t bring himself to be too upset. They had a roof over their heads, and they were together. Beck had lost a lot, but they would rebuild it better if that’s what he wanted. Kole couldn’t seea future without Beck in it, and he would do everything to make him happy. With everything that was going on in their lives—separately and together—they deserved some solace.

Hopefully, the police would do their job and find Andrew before he did anything else, either to harm them or himself. Life had a funny way of working out. He almost wished he’d never met Andrew, but if he hadn’t, he might not be where he was right then, and hedidn’twish that at all. Beck had become so important to him that he couldn’t imagine life alone, despite him having sworn it after his attack. Ethan had seen through him, but at the time, Kole couldn’t see the light. He was sure most people were the same. It took something amazing, something beautiful for them to rejoin the world and let themselves love.

Family was important. Friends were just as important. But it was those people theychoseto spend their lives with that became the building block of a contented person. Beck was that to Kole, and it was as much a surprise to Kole as it was to anyone else.

As he listened to Beck’s breathing evening out, he swore, to whatever deity was real and listening, that he would doanythingto give Beck what he deserved.Anything.

****

Once he’d told his parents and aunt about what happened, Auntie Ava was on the first train down. It was lovely to see her and introduce her to everyone at Life in Ink. Especially Beck. They got on like—for want of a much better word—a house on fire. She couldn’t stay long, but she promised to visit often, more so because she loved the shows. And in her words, no one does it like London.

He hadn’t expected his parents to come, mainly because they didn’t believe they needed to. He’d been used to it all his life, so he wasn’t bothered. He had Auntie Ava, he didn’t need any other family but the Life in Ink one.

****

Chapter 21

Beck

It took several days before they had any kind of information from the fire crew and police about what happened at his house, even with Donovan and Christian putting their weight behind it. They had been able to go in the following day to see if anything was salvageable, but what was left was nothing that Beck needed—or wanted. They hadn’t been able to find Kole’s phone, but a fire officer said it was unlikely to be easy to find in the ashes. They said they would keep an eye out for it, though.

Luckily, the neighbours’ houses hadn’t been affected by anything except the smoke, and that could be rectified easier than fire.

In the end, he took nothing from the house. It was all smoke-damaged and could be bought new, so there was no point. Instead, they holed up at Kole’s apartment, and if Beck was honest with himself, he loved that small apartment as much as his larger home. He’d thought having a large house would show people he was worthy. In hindsight, he was putting his middle finger up at the social workers who said he was nothing. He didn’t need therapy to tell him that then.

Although Karen, his therapist, was lovely. She would see him every week on his own and then once a week with Kole as they worked through the things that had happened. She also saw Kole once a week, too, after he’d transferred from his previous therapist to her. Beck wanted him and Kole to have a goodrelationship, and if therapy was the best choice, then he’d do it every day for hours at a time if that was what was needed.

He’d always believed that what Drake had done to him hadn’t affected him, except for the bottoming thing, but he had. He could admit that at that point in his life. After going through everything that had happened, he knew he had a lot of hang-ups that needed addressing, and he was grateful for every minute Kole gave him. He doubted he would ever feel like he deserved Kole’s love, but he would work every day for it and would never make him regret it. He wanted to be worthy of it.

And speaking of worthy… He looked over his shoulder to the man who had pushed right up against his back while they slept, his hot breath teasing his back. Beck couldn’t help himself. Ever so carefully, he rolled himself over to face Kole, nuzzling him onto his back with barely a murmur from the guy. In the early morning hours as it was, with the heating having only just turned on and therefore the air being chilly, the pebbling of his skin as he removed the cover was mesmerising. While he traced his fingers over the exposed skin, watching more goosebumps follow his path, he thought about what Kole had given him. He couldn’t list every single thing or every single way that Kole had improved his life, but when it came down to sex, he’d done more than Beck could ever have wished for. Giving up control had always been Beck’s fantasy, but the idea of trying it had scared him so much, he had never, ever contemplated even attempting to let someone do it. But as with everything since he’d met Kole, the man had blown that out the window.

Beck leaned over slightly and blew across Kole’s nipples, watching Kole shiver as the nubs hardened to little points. As much as Beck did like having someone else take control, there was still something in him that enjoyed watching somebody find pleasure in what he did to them.

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