Page 4 of Best I Never Had

One of the best things about being an adult well past the legal drinking age is that your past self starts to blur. Those cringe worthy memories as a teen start to fade and become replaced by new ones of adjusting to being an adult in the real world. But sometimes, those memories come back to you in human form. In my case, through Hayden Marshall.

He’s no longer dressed in his black Adidas hoodie, faded jeans, and Jack Purcells. Instead, he’s wearing an open chef’s jacket with a yellow bandanna loosely tied around his neck. His hair is tousled, long enough for it to be called shaggy and somehow evident that he doesn’t usually wear it as long as it is now.

“Tell me you didn’t have a crush on him in high school,” Lucy deadpans, expecting the obvious: that everyone in our high school, not just the ones in my and Hayden’s graduating class, thought he was attractive. “I’m going to invite him tonight.”

My head swerves to face her. “What? Why?”

“You said it yourself, it’ll most likely be just you, me, and Carmen. It’ll be fun!”

Before I can change her mind, Hayden reappears. He smiles at me and Lucy through the scattered water spots staining the glass door as he pushes it open to greet us once again.

“So, you moved all the way to New York City,” he says, his smile curving up as he looks at me.

“Yeah,” I answer with a timid voice. “I’ve been here since college.”

“Wow, that long?” He whistles. “I moved here from Chicago just before the summer. I’m still getting used to the city.”

“It takes time.” I smile sincerely.

“So,” Lucy interrupts, “we’re having a party tonight. Would you like to come?”

“Oh…”

“You don’t have to,” I add.

“But it would mean a lot if you did,” Lucy adds, side-eyeing me with a glare. “I’m only here for a couple of days.”

“Yeah, I’d love to,” Hayden answers with a smile.

“Are you sure?” I ask. Lucy not so discreetly nudges my side.

“Yeah,” Hayden affirms sincerely. “I don’t really know anyone in the city, so it would be nice to be around a familiar face.” His smile deepens, his eyes leaving Lucy’s to linger on me for a bit longer. I tilt my head to the side when I smile back, remembering how comfortable I used to be around him. Poking fun at his quirks and casually making jokes that led to learning a language of sarcasm only he and I seemed to understand.

Lucy clasps her hands in front of her. “Great! It’ll probably start around…ten?” She looks at me for confirmation, and I nod. “And if you have any cute friends, they’re welcome to come too.”

I suppress an impulsive eye roll as Hayden reaches into his pocket and pulls out his phone. He unlocks the screen and hands it to me. “Here, put in your number.”

“Oh yeah. Sure,” I say. I take his phone and do as I’m told, Lucy’s eyes practically glued on Hayden as he patiently waits for me.

Hayden looks down at his phone screen once it’s back in his hands. His hair hangs loosely across his forehead as he punches his fingers along the keyboard before aswishnoise emits from his phone. My phone pings from my back pocket.

“That’s me.”

I slide my phone out of my pocket and see a row of ten digits lighting up the screen with a new message. “So we’ll see you tonight?” I ask, smiling up at him.

“Yep. I’ll be there.”

Lucy smiles proudly at me with her chin tilted upward and lips pursed together in silent approval.

“See you tonight!” Lucy exclaims as she lightly shoves me in the direction of my apartment. “Come on,” she says in a hushed tone even though Hayden is out of earshot. “I have to look extra sexy tonight.”

2

Hayden

senior year

“If you don’t mind,can I label the cell samples today?”

---