Page 45 of No Place Like You

I stop to bury my face into my hands, and I feel Dexter’s warm hand on my arm. “None of that’s your fault.”

“I guess,” I say, chewing my lip. “It’s just…Do you ever wish you could see into the future? And just know that whatever decision you’re making is the right one?”

He nods, and the wrinkles on his forehead scrunch together. “All the time,” he answers bleakly.

“Right,” I agree, leaning toward him with a small pat on his knee. “Lately, I’ve been wishing that more and more. Like, if I could know this internship was the right choice and I’m not wasting my time being here…I just want to know if all of it will be worth it.”

“You know, there’s really no way to know those kinds of things.”

“No, I know,” I say softly.

“Can I say something, and you just not brush it off as me saying something nice or trying to get on your good side?”

I feel my body curl inwards like a tiny pill bug to protect myself, too uncomfortable with flattery and recognition.

“It takes a huge feat of bravery to do what you did. Uprooting your life and taking a chance on a talent you want to hone. Not everyone can say they took a shot at their dream. And even if none of this works out, which is impossible from where I stand, you can’t say you didn’t try.”

I stay quiet, tightening into a cocoon of safety and doubt, something much more familiar than Dexter’s warm blanket of sweet words.

Dexter stands from his seat and extends his hand toward me. “Come on.”

I frown, a little confused but curious. “What?”

“We’re going out.”

“Like…to Hayden’s restaurant?” I ask, still confused.

“No,” he answers, brushing a hand in my direction. “Just…come on.”

22

Dexter

Summer nightsin New York City buzz like a live wire. It’s like all winter and spring, New Yorkers hibernate, enjoying the warmth indoors in the midst of the biting cold, and when the chill finally thaws, we come out of our shell. When Lucy and I leave my apartment, we step into the still warm city night, blending into the crowded streets. We talkSupernaturaltheories. I listen to Lucy predict the ending to season eight as we move on to season nine based on her own hypotheses and her general preference for Sam Winchester. We talk about Hawaii, our roles as best man and maid of honor, who Hayden and Natalia’s kids would take after. If they’d get Hayden’s height or Natalia’s deep brown eyes. The exact same ones Lucy has.

“So, are you going to tell me where we’re going?” she asks, those brown eyes reflecting dim flickers of lights coming off the light posts and street signs. We’ve taken the subway to cross the bridge to the Upper East Side, and we’re still walking through the streets, dodging people throughintersections and moving about at a leisurely pace. Or as leisurely as Lucy’s curiosity will allow.

“It’s a surprise.” I keep my chin held high and can feel Lucy’s inquisitive gaze studying me. “Baring your eyes into my soul isn’t going to get you the answer.”

She shrugs as I turn to face her. “It doesn’t hurt to try.”

I stop walking when we approach a building where a doorman stands outside, his stark white gloves contrasting against his navy uniform and impassive smile. “Fourteen B. I believe Mr. Park called down for us.”

The doorman’s smile deepens as he reaches for the shiny gold handle on the heavy door. “Yes, Mr. Greer. Would you like me to show you to the elevator?”

I shake my head. “I’m okay.”

He nods in response, and I turn to face Lucy looking bewildered and scared. “Okay, if you have a room lined with plastic tarp and torture weapons somewhere in this fancy building, I should warn you, I have pepper spray and a really sharp clicky pen in my purse.”

I laugh and extend my hand in her direction. She eyes it warily before latching on to my arm. The pads of her fingers glide against my skin as her hand slinks into mine, and she smiles at me so adoringly. The apples of her cheeks round, and her eyes curve into little half moons. She sinks to my side with a level of ease I didn’t notice until I realize how much of her guard is finally down. Those slabs of concrete she’s built around her, the ones constructed with the stress of her internship and everything she’s been keeping from her family, start to soften a little, opening up and letting me in.

As we hop in the elevator and it ascends, I feel Lucy’s hand grip me tighter.

“Hayden and I have a friend we went to college with,” I start to explain. “He lives in this building, and sometimes we use the roof access.”

“Like to seduce a hot date?”

I smirk. “More like parties or to take a breather. Eighteen stories up will take you to a whole ’nother world.”

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