Page 36 of Counting His heartbeats

"Catch up then, Tigress, because this thing is forever, especially since we have a baby together."

I don't need days, months, or years to know that I want Zurmani to be mine in every way. The electric volt I felt when touching her for the first time was my heart's response to finding its soulmate.

"Give me some time to acclimate to motherhood first because I feel it's gonna be a major undertaking."

"No, it won't. It's clear that our paths have already been set, so the first thing we need to do is get right with God."

An uncontainable smile forms when the memory of Zurmani and me praying in the chapel enters my mind.

"All right, God, you've given Jawaan and me a lot to digest today. Before we ask for anything, I want to pause for a moment to tell you thank you. I don't understand your goodness toward me but thank you. I don't understand the blessings you provide for me but thank you. For your unmerited favor, thank you. Please give Jawaan and me the ability to raise and love this child you see fit to enhance our lives. Give us the wisdom, knowledge, and understanding necessary to be the parents you have given us the privilege to become. Right now, we surrender to Your will. Endow us with the tools to parent according to exercise Proverbs 22:6 in its full extent?—"

"What is Proverbs 22? I'm not well versed in the Bible like you seem to be," I confess, cutting Zurmani off.

"How are you cutting me off in the middle of praying? We're gonna have to work on your prayer etiquette because Godwon't be pleased if you continue this behavior." Zurmani's eyes are tight and hard while looking at me.

"My bad, but I want to make sure I can agree without restriction. Can you tell me what the scripture says, please?"

"Ugh. Excuse me, God," Zurmani requests, standing to her full height in front of me while resting her right hand on her waist. "Okay, it says: Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it."

"Oh. Good looking out. Let me finish since you're standing here with an RBF, and that's not how you need to petition the Savior of the world." Placing my hands in the praying hands position, I close my eyes and start praying, fighting the smirk begging to slide into place upon hearing Zurmani grumbling.

"While I haven't been attending church on a regular basis, I'm not a heathen," Zurmani says, causing me to return to the present conversation after walking down memory lane.

"Sticks and stones, Tigress. Sticks and stones."

"What are you talking about?"

"I feel like you're calling me a heathen, so I'm just saying. Besides, your statement alone lets me know that we can both benefit from taking Little Man to church. I would also like to develop a corporate prayer routine for us. I enjoyed hearing you pray and think it's something we should add to our relationship."

Despite being unorthodox by cutting Zurmani off during her prayer, I found myself intrigued and hanging onto every word she spoke. Zurmani's ability to pray to the Lord increased my attraction to her. I have never dated a woman who seems to know God intimately. Zurmani doesn't know how much I need a woman who possesses that quality.

"Now that we have a name for our son, when are we going to tell our families?" Zurmani asks, biting her bottom lip with trepidation shining in her eyes.

"Oh, that reminds me. I wanted to see if you would be available to come to my brother's for a family dinner this Sunday. We can tell my family then. Let me know whenever you want us to share the news with your people."

"Okay. I can do that, but since I'm doing dinner, you need to attend church with me."

"Hm. Looks like we're already activating our ability to compromise. Church, then family dinner... it's a date."

"A date it is. Let's go to the hospital tomorrow to see Jalil. We also need to be updated on his health and when they anticipate his ability to come home. Wow. I can't believe we're having this conversation right now."

I can. You and Little Man are the help God promised me not long ago. You really are a miracle worker, God. Thank you for my blessings.

"Jawaan," Zurmani calls my name, returning my attention to her.

"What's up, Tigress?"

"We don't have to be a co?—"

"Tuh. You ain't about to have me out here like a single dad, Zurmani. Stop trying to forestall God's plans. He knows what's best for us."

"What am I gonna do with you, Jawaan Young?"

"Love me for the man I will always be for you, Tigress. Heartache and heartbreak will never be words you feel or experience with me."

That Sunday

"Father, in the name of Jesus, I come thanking you for another day. Forgive me for the times when I let the things I face on a daily basis become greater than my service to you. I feel like a hypocrite for preparing myself for church when my life doesn't line up with?—

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