Page 102 of You, As You Are

It’d been half an hour since they’d both gotten under the duvet, and Maisie’s brain was practically a fully charged battery. There was no ‘off’ button. And what kept her awake?Iainbreathingbeside her. The rhythmic sound was too damn distracting. All of him was warm, and that warmth carried his scent. Maisie couldn’t pin down what it was exactly without looking at any of the bottles he’d lined up on the shower’s shelf – but if sweatily chopping logs and throwing them onto a burning, smoky fire could be bottled, then that’s what she lay beside.

Or triednotto lay beside. The shiplap wall was an inch from her nose as she lay in the most uncomfortable, sidewards plank position known to man.

“Can you stop that?” Iain grumbled in the absolute darkness.

“Stop what?” she answered a little sharply.

“Making me think I’m making you uncomfortable.” His voice was deeper in the dead of night, like the devil himself rasping in her ear.

Maisie tucked her arms further into her chest. “We’re sharing a bed, if you haven’t noticed.” She’d been trying to do him a favour by staying as far away as possible.

“I’m sure you’ve shared a bed with someone else before.”

Yes, she had, but …

Without a quip ready to go, Maisie’s silence went on for a little too long. And the more it went on, the more she knew Iain would be thinking hervirginstatus didn’t just includerarebit.

She had to saysomething.“It’s … been a long while,” she clarified.

Iain took a deep breath, and Maisie never expected him to say, “Me too.”

For some reason, she rolled onto her back and laid her silk bonnet covered head on her too-flat pillow. Miraculously, only her elbow bumped what she hoped was Iain’s; she couldn’t tell with the absolute darkness. Ted snoring from his bed at the foot of theirs the only sound.

“When was your last?” she pried. Not to judge a book by its cover, but Maisie didn’t believe that if Iain made an offer to any lady with the capacity to lust then that lady would sayno.

She received a huff in protest, as expected, imagining the easy arc of his eyebrow. “Really?”

“I think it’s only fair that I know what kind of rakeI’m dealing with here,” Maisie playfully argued, smiling to herself as she stared at the ceiling.

“Ladies first.”

“Age before beauty.”

As her eyes slowly adjusted to the darkness, Maisie swore that Iain at least cracked a smile. A sound like bristles scratching softly hinted she’d be getting an honest answer; the man lying beside her didn’t run a hand over his bearded face and make himself stressed over nothing.

Seconds later, he said, “January.”

She frowned. “That’s not that long.”

“Of last year.”

Maisie took back her words, rolling her lips together. “Oh.” Thatwasa long time ago. Over a year – which wasn’t that long in some contexts, but in this one …

Evidently, they were both well and truly in a sexual dry spell. That kiss they’d shared had been Maisie’s first in over eight months, and being in a man’s arms again had been overwhelming to her system – like being shocked back to life. So she couldn’t imagine what Iain might’ve felt after double that time on his own, if he’d felt anything at all. The way he took care of her, held her hand and reassured her constantly, even how he’d given her his coat this evening – it didn’t feel meaningless.

Maybe it was and she just didn’t want it to be.

Maybe the distance closing between them was just a product of the situation they’d found themselves in: two lonely people caught up in a fake entanglement. There were bound to be linesthat blurred, and Maisie couldn’t stop them from happening. Shelikedhim. She liked when he cracked a smile that was just for her, when his rare laugh rumbled when they were alone. When he opened himself up like this and let her see inside of his toughI-don’t-need-anyoneexterior.

His kingdom might be lost, but all lost things were meant to be found again.

Iain offered up more detail that he didn’t have to give her. “Was the first time after my engagement ended.”

The washing-powder-scented duvet stretched against Maisie’s chest as she inhaled, too easily tempted by her curiosity to dig deeper into his story. He’d sounded ashamed about sleeping with someone else after breaking up. “Do you feel like you betrayed her? Your ex?”

Iain’s breathing stopped.

Maisie closed her eyes and screwed them shut. She’d gone too far. Fished in waters too deep.

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