Page 155 of You, As You Are

His kiss and his touch meant the world, but every other way in which Iain took care of her in ways she had never let herself be taken care of, meant more.

And now it was all gone.

At least she thought it was. No matter how much hope Maisie clung to, she wouldn’t settle for something casual, and he didn’t want to give her more.

“Noneof it was real?” Vera asked, sounding as confused as all the knots tangled up in Maisie’s heartstrings.

“I … I’m not too sure anymore.”

“Oh, Moo Moo.” Vera softened beside her. “You’ve fallen for him.”

Maisie sniffed and buried her face in her hands, one syllable shaking from her lips.“Yes.”Her tears fell without much luck of stopping them. “I don’t know what’s happening. He said that he wasn’t ready to commit to a relationship again, but everything that he does – it’s all I want.”

“A man like that,” Vera said, “they don’t always know how to speak their feelings. Their love is in what they do.”

Maisie shook her head and wiped her nose on yet another sleeve that would need to be washed. “Iain doesn’t love me.”

“I think you are wrong.” A gentle smile graced Vera’s lips. “It was there the moment he took your hand in the café. I saw it. He looked over at you like you’re his entire universe.”

“He’s held me like that, too.” Maisie sat herself upright, so she didn’t squish her grandma any more than she already had, letting one leg dangle from the bed. “I was supposed to go with him to see his dad for the first time in years on Sunday, but I found you when I was on my way, and I forgot to call him. He needed my support, and I let him down.”

Vera gave her a subtle smirk. “I don’t believe it will take his rational brain too long to forgive you.”

He already had, but that’s not why Maisie was so upset. “His ‘rational brain’ tells him he can’t commit to someone again.”

“And what does yours say?”

She thought about it, but it was her heart that overruled her. “That I’m not so homesick now because of him. I don’t miss London anymore, and I’m comfortable here. I broke out of my mould. I want to make this place, here, my home.” Her chin trembled. “I just don’t want to make it without him.”

Her grandma took her hand. “Well then,” Vera said, “you know exactly what you need to do.”

CHAPTER FORTY-SIX

MAISIE

The icy watersof the tide foamed over her toes, drawing in and out as the sun rose on the horizon. Maisie turned her chin up to the breeze and let it kiss her cheek. It was a frigid March morning, but where the sun hit her was just warm enough to take the edge off.

Ever since her talk with Vera, her body’s aching, tightly wound reaction to the last week had settled. Standing here, she felt empty of pain; her chest was the lightest it had been in days.

She filled her lungs with the salty air of the first good morning in weeks.

No one else was around, which wasn’t surprising considering how early it was. Maisie had no idea what had compelled her to jump out of bed and make her way here at dawn, other than an impulse thatthiswas where she was meant to be.

Last night, she’d called each of her brothers, her parents, and her friends to tell them all the news that she’d decided to stay in this town. All of them had been surprised, but none had asked her to explain herself. She didn’t know how to put into words that she didn’t want to leave.

‘If you ever miss home, find your way to the water.’

Every time she’d craved to go back home, she’d set her sights in the wrong direction.

This was it. This is where she belonged. So long as she could find a place to live, at least. Her probationary tenancy at the bookshop flat would be up in a few weeks. But that didn’t matter just now – it was a problem fortomorrow’sMaisie to start figuring out.

Someone’s dog barked in the distance behind her. The shallow tide rose up and tickled her feet, her toes shifting and pressing into the sand. She’d left her shoes and a towel a few paces back where the water wouldn’t get to them, but something else clearly had – an ankle boot landed on her foot and made her snap it out of the water with a yelp.

“Ted?” The unexpected wiry body wiggled and danced on the water-soaked pebbles, a dopey grin on his face as if he was happy to see her. “What are you …?”

“I quit my job.”

Maisie’s body went still midway to grasping Ted’s collar. She hadn’t heard that voice for six days, and still it sent a quiet wave of longing thrumming through her.