Philip blows out air between his lips. “Come on, Beast. You know I don’t mind. And I want to hear all about this guy who’s got your attention. He must be pretty special.”
My heart constricts. “He is. Hopefully you can meet him when this is all over.”
Brian speaks from behind me. “You can bring him to the wedding.” He’s holding two mugs and he offers me one. It’s bright red like the one throw pillow.
I don’t think Brian’s realized that I didn’t ask for anything to drink. I sniff at what he’s offered though and it seems to be strong, black coffee so I don’t complain.
“I’m so sorry to do this,” Philip says, “but I have shift in a few hours. Do you mind if I grab some shut eye?”
“No, please go ahead.” The last thing I want is to impose on his routine.
He says goodnight to Brian and the screen flickers off. Brian returns to the kitchen. “Would you like something to eat? Please say yes. I’ve got three loaves of fresh sourdough bread and no one to feed them to.”
While we eat our sandwiches, Brian keeps up a constant stream of chatter. He’s been pretty much alone in this part of the house for months, so I’m not surprised. He tells me about his experiments with baking bread, about a game he’s been playingonline with his step brother and friends back home, where you have to identify who among you is the killer, and about the wedding plans. Or at least what plans there were before the pandemic. He seems pretty sure Philip’s parents will come round once their son is not putting himself in daily danger.
“It sounds hard, being here all alone,” I say. I know something of loneliness.
“It’s theworst. I’ve been bored out of my mind.” He laughs and waves at the collection of sourdough bread. “You can’t believe how glad I am to have you here. I’m sorry if it’s all a bit much— I can be a bit much anyway and now I’m out of practice. Masking? What’s that? Anyway, Philip didn’t give me any details. Just said it was about a boy?”
I can’t help but smile at the onslaught. I can see why Philip likes Brian. There’s nothing hidden, everything’s on the surface. “Yes. And actually, I have a favor to ask.”Another one.I reach into my pocket for the strip of paper. “It’s perfectly all right if you don’t feel comfortable leaving the house, but I was hoping you could take me to see him. I have the address where he’s staying and it’s not far.”
Brian’s eyes go wide. “Oh, yeah, I could do that. Totally.”
Usually I wouldn’t call on someone this late, but by my calculations Zane and Jonathan just arrived. My stomach twists with nerves. After how we left things, I’m not even sure Jonathan wants to see me. But I need to see him. I need to see if he’s okay.
So I direct Brian to the address I got from Sebastian and, as I do, Brian’s eyebrows pinch. When we draw up outside the house, he’s tensed all over and frowning. It’s a large rectangularhouse, with a wrap-around porch and a slew of large windows spilling light onto the street. I can see shadows moving behind the windows.
“What did you say your guy’s name was?” Brian asks.
“Jonathan?” I’m not sure what could be causing his concern.
He gets out of the car with me, still frowning and follows me to the door. There’s a bell, but I choose to knock softly instead. Then I doubt myself. Did they hear that? Should I ring? I don’t want to disturb anyone.
I don’t realize I’m holding my breath until the door opens and I release it. There’s a pretty blond man standing there, with high cheekbones and his hair swept into a bun. He lets out a little “oh’ of surprise when he sees me. I know I can be quite imposing. Before I can say anything, Brian says, “Thank fuck.”
The blond’s gaze swings to him. “Brian?” He laughs, astonished. “What in the world are you doing here?”
“I could ask the same. When I saw it wasthishouse I thought that— I thought Adam’s guy was friends with your brothers. It was about to get awkward AF.”
“Adam?” the blond looks to me again. “Oh! You’re Adam? But how? Brian? What?” He giggles. “What is going on?”
Jonathan appears behind him. Maybe he heard my name. His eyes are wide, his face is drawn. Brian is busy explaining my connection to Philip but I only half hear.
“I’d like to talk to Jonathan. If I may?” I know I probably cut Brian off but I don’t care. Jonathan looks so fragile, sobroken.
“Oh, of course you may,” the blond says, standing aside.
For one horrible moment I think Jonathan doesn’t want to see me. I don’t move inside, I shouldn’t be here if he doesn’t want me here. But then he strides forward, past Elam and directly into my arms.
He buries his face against me and I just hold him.
“All righty,” Brian says. “I'll just squeeze on past then?” He steps around me.
In the house behind Elam, I see a striking man with a close-cropped dark beard appear. He sees me, startles a little, then steps backwards out of sight. I smile into Jonathan’s hair. “I think we’ll be a minute,” I tell the blond.
“Sure, uh,” he hesitates with the door, then elects to close it gently to give us some privacy.
“I’m still angry,” Jonathan says, voice muffled by my shirt. “But now, I can’t… I need…” His voice breaks and he starts to cry.