Page 79 of The Beast's Heart

“Yes. It went well, I think. We’ll tell the social worker and the therapist and that should be that.”

“He won’t face consequences once he’s, you know, back in the system?”

My stomach drops. “No. The, uh, the children are in their rooms. It should be safe to go back to that side of the house.”

His face falls. “Oh. Thank you.”

“I didn’t mean… you don’t have to leave now.”

He smiles, but it’s forced. “You’ve been more than accommodating. I have a good book waiting for me.”

I call after him as he leaves. He turns in the doorway, squinting towards me. Even as I open my mouth, I have no idea how I’m going to say what I need to. What comes out is, “I wouldn’t have hurt you.”

He blinks and I’m not sure if it’s his shortsightedness or that he doesn’t believe me.

“I know I was angry, and loud, and threatening. I know it’s going to take time for you to trust me again. But please believe, I wouldn’t have hurt you.” It feels like an echo of the conversation I had with Mal. “You’re safe here. With me.”

His face softens and once again it’s all I can do to stop myself from crossing the space and wrapping him in my arms.

32

JONATHAN

Geoff finds me in the classroom after lessons end on Monday. He waits for the children to leave, then leans his hip against the desk, arms folded, and asks me, “How are you feeling, Teach?”

I want to give him the benefit of the doubt, but there’s something about the way he asks the question that sets me on edge. Still, it’s best to be polite. I shuffle the worksheets I intend to mark tonight into a neat pile. “Oh, I’m perfectly well. Thank you.”

“No hypothermia?”

I force a laugh. “No. Thankfully.”

He’s looking at me in that disconcerting way he has. It’s too intense, too intimate, but wholly without desire. I feel like I’m being measured up. Maybe it’s because I’m without my glasses in borrowed clothes. The children were equal parts surprised and amused by how different I look. Mal stated that I looked like a mole.

“You feel up for our lesson?” Geoff asks.

With so much other disruption, it’s probably a good idea to keep the routines I can in place. “I think so. Yes.”

He smirks. “Great. I’ve been looking forward to getting you in the ring.”

“The ring? You really think I’m ready?”

“Best way to learn’s by doing. You should know that, Teach. How’s tonight? Or you too bruised up?”

I straighten my spine. Despite what he might think, I’m not quite that delicate. “No, tonight would be fine.”

I’m used to finding the foundation offices empty when I go up for our sessions, but today Adam and Meredith are at one of the desks, discussing something on the screen. They look up when I enter and I give an awkward wave. Geoff jumps up from his desk and gestures me into the gym. He’s already in his sports clothes.

Rain still lashes the windows and an icy draft comes in from somewhere. We hurry through warm-ups and stretches. Geoff seems distracted, like he’s in a rush to get the lesson over with.

I hug myself while Geoff heads to the equipment. “Everyone seems to be working late. Is something wrong?”

He tosses me a pair of gloves (which I miss) and says, “Yeah. The foundations’s running out of cash.”

“What? Because of the pandemic?”

“Yeah. And because The Beast is rubbish at marketing and keeps blocking my every attempt. He won’t even let me start a TikTok with the kids. They’d love it. Have you met a kid who doesn’t love TikTok?”

I fasten on my gloves. The warm yellow light in the room should be cozy, but it doesn’t feel that way at all. “I don’t know if that would be allowed. Legally.”

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