Page 40 of Enemy of the State

“I’m fine,” I reply, staring back up at the ceiling. I close my eyes before they blast back open wide. I can’t go to sleep. I’m not safe in this room. I have to stay awake. I couldn’t help it when I wasunconscious, but I can help it now, and I blink hard against weariness tugging at me.

Digs scoots closer as he sweeps a hand over my forehead, pushing some of my hair back. The gesture is achingly tender and something peculiar flickers in my chest as if a candle’s been lit, but I snuff it out. “I promise you’re safe. No one knows you’re here. I haven’t left you since bringing you in here and Ja—Honey Eyes is outside the room. Nothing bad will happen to you while you sleep.”

How can I trust the man responsible for so much of my suffering? Iwantto believe him, and the veracity shining in his luminous silvery-blue eyes is so bright that I don’t doubt their sincerity. I’ve always made it a habit to rely on the steadfastness of my gut feelings, and that’s never led me astray before, so I shouldn’t question my instincts now.

Besides, I’d be stupid to pass up the opportunity to sleep on a bed.

There’s something I’ve been wanting to know for the last several days, though, and considering the pleasant mood Digs appears to be in, I decide to explore that trust a little more—however reckless that may be—I murmur, “What month is it?”

“December.”

My eyelids slam shut then, blotting out the anguish now pricking the backs of my eyes at hearing that single word.

Sean

I sat at Louhi’s bedside all night, watching the steady rise and fall of her chest. Beautiful is too slight a word to describe this woman, and I couldn’t resist the temptation to touch her, telling myself that tending to her wounds and checking on her broken fingers wasn’treallytouching her.

With an impressive display of self-restraint, I managed to hold off until she was awake before putting my hands on her in any meaningful way, but I didn’t stop after she fell back asleep. Keeping her small hand in mine, feeling her pulse thrum against my middle finger, I held her hand until she regained consciousness once again.

When she woke back up, I mentally slapped myself for going so fucking soft as Jace and I took her back to her cell, leaving her with some food and water.

I should be getting answers for Thompson, not ensuring her comfort and safety.

I’m not sure if it’s the lack of sleep or the fact that this woman is upending my entire life, but after Jace and I both showered and changed, I grumbled at him to meet me on the roof.

Before heading up there, I made a detour to snatch Mercer’s and Lou’s files from the locked cabinet in the office, where I’ve kept them since only Jace and I have the combination.

Jace is smoking a cigarette when I get to the rooftop, and he offers me a smoke that I greedily accept, considering what a long-ass night it’s been.

Slumping in the chair next to him, I sigh. He mutters an amused affirmation, adding, “Fucking Lou.”

I grunt in response and take a drag of the cancer stick before bringing life to the thought that’s been lurking in the darkest corners of my mind. “What if she didn’t do it?”

“Do what?”

“What if she didn’t attempt to set those bombs off? What if she didn’t even plant them in the first place? What if she isn’t the terrorist responsible for that?”

Jace scoffs as he tips his head back up at the morning sky. “You’re delusional. Of course, she did it. She wouldn’t be here unless she was guilty.”

I face him, despite his eyes being closed as he soaks up the sun’s rays. “Hear me out. I think we have it wrong. I don’t think she did it.”

He lifts his head then, eyeing me with both confusion and concern.

“Sean,” he starts. Peoplerarelyuse my first name, so I know he’s serious when he continues. “The government doesn’t fuck up when they send people here. If you’re at Exile Island, you did what you’re accused of, you’re a problem that needs to be solved. You know this.”

“But what if the government fucked upthis time?”

I’m not a conspiracy theorist; I believe facts. And I’ve been fitting together facts like a ten-thousand-piece puzzle when it comes to Lou. The image isn’t revealing itself to be anything like the one I’ve been told to see.

Jace shakes his head before arguing, “Command doesn’t make mistakes like that. I think you’re seeing what youwantto see.”

He might be right. I don’t want Lou to be responsible for such heinous acts and, more importantly, I don’t want to have to put her to death. However, there’s a piece of me that truly doubts she did the things she’s being accused of. If there’s a chance—even a small, miniscule chance—that she’s innocent of those crimes, I want to give her the opportunity to keep breathing, to keep living.

Pushing further, I retort, “Seriously, what if they did?”

Jace sighs before taking another drag and relenting. “Fine, I’ll bite. Why do you think that?”

“What if she hasn’t been answering our questions because she doesn’t know? She has no idea where the next attack will be. She doesn’t know why the Fed was targeted. She doesn’t have anyone working for her. What if it’s all because she isn’t the terrorist the damn government claims? She said once that I needed to ask better questions and what if that’s because she can’t answer these?”